Cherish Every Moment Book 4: A Walk In Love

All of the above

The ride back to the hotel was mostly quiet. Avi didn't say anything at all after leaving the radio station. He wasn't angry. He wasn't sad. He wasn't being sullen or anything out of the ordinary. Nothing that should not have happened had happened while they were performing. No one said or did anything to cause him to shut them out. If they had chosen to talk to him, Avi would have responded accordingly. He was just being quiet, thinking. In just a couple of hours everything had changed for him. He found someone that he really enjoyed spending his time with. Someone that was respectful and kind, gentle and patient. Someone he desperately wanted to get back to spending time with. Avi had met others, other girls that had caught his attention; some with their looks, some with their behavior, some he couldn't tell you how or why if he tried. All of them seemed to fall by the wayside. He didn't care anymore that they had. It always turned out to be for the best. Some of them hurt him in ways he didn't much like, but he never let that get in his way. He'd meet someone he thought was special, spend time with them, get to know them, only to find that they were either not who he thought they were or they wanted something from him he was not prepared to give. Sometimes that was his body, most of the time that turned out to be his heart. There was only one of them that truly mattered to him, made a difference in his world. She was sitting in the seat in front of him. He could try to deny his love for Kirstin all that he wanted to, but that would not change the fact that he loved her. She had a piece of his heart he couldn't take back; he didn't want to. Avi did love Kirstin, loved her then, loved her now, and would always love her. It was true, however that love had shifted and changed in a way that he hadn't expected. When things between them ended. He took a day, which was all the time he had, to work through his emotions, to push them aside and put them in a box, in his heart and mind, to never be opened again. Over the years, he let the dust settle on that box. He hadn't forgotten about it or that he loved her, he just kept those feelings locked away and didn't share them with her or anyone else. When he took the box down off the shelf, wiped the dust off, unlocked it and cracked the lid, he found that the love he'd locked inside had changed. He no longer had a longing for Kirstin or felt desire for her like he once did. Instead, he found that he just loved her. Loved Kirstin with all that he was, but not at all like he had in the past, the love was just plain and simple. Powerful, yet simple; very similar to the love he had for his sister. She was a part of his world now. As long as everything was right with her, he could be happy; happy for her. Avi had to admit that he was relieved to know that the love for Kirstin he put in that box was still love. It could have turned into a great many things that would have been horrible and uncomfortable for them all. Avi sat quietly, staring out the window letting his mind wander wherever it wanted to go.

The others watched Avi without him even knowing that they were. He just sat and looked out the window, lost within his thoughts, and watched the city roll by. He checked the time on his phone to make sure that he would arrive when he said he would or earlier. He let his mind wander to Rayne, to the last few moments he had spent with her that morning. His mind became occupied with thoughts of her. He wondered if he was moving faster than he needed to, if his body had taken control of the ride and he was going to rush into the things he wanted to do with her without taking the time to savor the moments they'd share. More than anything, He wanted those moments, the first time he ever gave himself to another to be special, not just another day, but a day that they would both remember forever. He wanted to share those moments with her. He wasn't sure he'd know how to tell her, but he was certain that no matter what he said, Rayne would understand and she would wait patiently, without complaint. Avi was also certain that if he were to tell her what he was thinking and how he felt that she would help him be strong when he was weak, would stop him if need be from sacrificing the joy of the moments for the sake of physical gratification. Avi trusted her completely and he wasn't sure why he did. She could have forced it the other day. He was pretty sure that she knew what the hell she was doing, even if he didn't, and could have shifted enough to put him inside her and force it to happen. But she didn't do that. She also could have just rolled him on his back, he'd have gone along with it without hesitation or complaint and made it happen that way. There were a great many things that could have happened that morning. He had plenty of time to think through it all and found himself grateful that things happened the way that they did; that he doubted, questioned, cried and confessed. It was all necessary to get him where he was emotionally, to prepare him for what came next. He was ready. Avi sat quiet, content within his own mind, reflecting on the morning and the past few days. Breakfast was truly much nicer than he thought it would be. Rayne was warm and receptive to him from the moment their eyes met again. Her smile wrapped his heart and momentarily stopped it in his chest. Avi felt the spark, the fire, the connection that he felt the moment his eyes met hers the night they collided in the hall and he made her drop her bucket of ice. He smiled at the memory. It was a wonderful moment. She looked up at him and smiled, her eyes full of life and laughter. He knew immediately that she recognized him, he also knew that she didn't care; it felt so good. She didn't freak-out, didn't fan girl on him, didn't say 'Oh My God it's you.' She just smiled up at him and laughed. She could have been angry with him for his clumsiness, just running into her like that, but she wasn't. She wasn't angry at all, in fact she apologized for running into him, laughing at herself when she bent down to gather the scattered ice and dropped bucket. Where most people would have lost their patience, hers expanded to encompass him. Avi may as well have fallen in love with her then, but he knew that wasn't when it had happened. He wasn't sure that it had in fact happened yet. She held his heart, that was clear, and he wanted to know her in ways that he didn't know anyone. He was already filled with the desire to know her in any way that she would allow him to before he had actually met her. That was what led to the incident in the first place. Avi almost laughed out loud thinking of the laughter that they shared that night. His heart swam in love, warmth and comfort at the thought of how peacefully she slept in his arms; how at peace he was by her side. He dreamt with her in his arms, woke tangled in hers. He had ached and agonized over missing her, wondering if he would have the honor of seeing her again, cried and doubted the feelings that he felt, the actions that he took, the love that he shared with her. He had almost given her his body. If time had permitted, he would have. He didn't think about the consequences at the time, he wasn't sure that he ever would. She held him, his heart in her hands, in a way that no other ever had; ever would. There was nothing in this world that he would ever withhold from her. His heart, his mind, his love, honest and pure, his body, it was hers to have, to hold. He didn't know how or when that happened. She would have it all. He didn't know what she would give of herself. He doubted that she would withhold any part of herself from him. He didn't care. He would be happy with all that she gave, rejoice in it. And would do his best to understand if there were things that she couldn't give. He felt the heat of her passion, the warmth of her kindness and the fire of her love. It all scorched him. He wanted more and he didn't care if he got burned. Avi was all in and he knew there was no backing out. When they met for breakfast that morning, every emotion he felt holding her in his arms came rushing back at him. Every fear and worry he had since was washed away. By her side was right where he belonged, Avi didn't want to be anywhere else.