(We see a gigantic flowing blue cloak being used as a symbol to celebrate the Wicked Witch’s demise. Suddenly, Citizens OF Jump City spill out, cheering and celebrating. The cape disappears and we are outside the Wizard’s Palace, in Jump City, capital of the Land of Noll)
ALL-
Good News! She’s Dead!
The Witch Of The West Is Dead!
The Wickedest Witch There Ever Was.
The Enemy Of All Us Here In Noll. Is Dead!
Good News! Good News!
Someone In The Crowd-
Look! It’s Starfire!
(Starfire appears and descends from the sky while creating fireworks with her Starbolts, as the crowd points and cheers.)
Various People-
Is it really her? It is, it’s her! Starfire! We love yeeew, Starfirrrre!
Starfire -
It’s good to see me, isn’t it?
Crowd -
(Shrieks)
Yes!
Starfire -
No need to respond—that was rhetorical.
Fellow Citizens—
Let Us Be Glad
Let Us Be Grateful
Let Us Rejoicify That Goodness Could Subdue
The Wicked Workings Of You-know-who
Isn’t It Nice To Know
That Good Will Conquer Evil?
The Truth We All Believe’ll By And By
Outlive A Lie
For You And—
Someone In The Crowd-
No One Mourns The Wicked
Another Person-
No One Cries: “They Won’t Return!”
All-
No One Lays A Lily On Their Grave
Man-
The Good Man Scorns The Wicked!
Women-
Through Their Lives, Our Children Learn:
All-
What We Miss When We Misbehave…
Starfire -
And Goodness Knows The Wicked’s Lives Are Lonely
Goodness Knows The Wicked Die Alone
It Just Shows When You’re Wicked You’re Left Only On Your Own…
All-
Yes, Goodness Knows The Wicked’s Lives Are Lonely
Goodness Knows The Wicked Cry Alone
Nothing Grows For The Wicked They Reap Only What They’ve Sown…
Girl In The Crowd-
Glinda, why does Wickedness happen?
Starfire -
That’s a good question. One that many people find confusifying: Are people born Wicked? Or do they have Wickedness thrust upon them? After all, she had a childhood. She had a father…
Trigon -
I’m off to the Assembly, dear!
Starfire-
And she had a mother. As so many do…
Trigon-
Oh… How I Hate To Go And Leave You Lonely
Arella-
That’s Alright—it’s Only Just One Night
Trigon-
But Know That You’re Here In My Heart While I’m Out Of Your Sight…
(Trigon leaves, and instantly, Arella wipes his kiss from her cheek. She opens a door…)
Starfire -
And like every family—they had their secrets.
(And her Lover, a mysterious man whose face remains in the shadows, appears.)
Lover-
Have Another Drink, My Dark-eyed Beauty
I’ve Got One More Night Left Here In Town
So Have Another Drink Of Red Elixir
And We’ll Have Ourselves A Little Mixer
Have Another Little Swallow, Little Lady, And Follow Me Down…
(They kiss; sink to the floor. The Lover disappears. Arella struggles back to her feet, now hugely pregnant—)
Starfire-
But from the moment she was born she was… well, different.
Arella-
Agghhh!!
(Trigon rushes in, along with a Midwife. THEY hold her—)
Midwife-
It’s coming…
Trigon-
Now?
Midwife-
The baby’s coming…
Trigon-
And how!
Midwife-
I See A Nose…
Trigon-
I See A Curl…
Midwife & Trigon-
It’s A Healthy Perfect Lovely Little…
Midwife-
Ohhhhh!
Trigon-
Sweet Noll!
Arella-
What is it? What’s wrong?
Midwife-
How Can It Be?
Trigon-
What Does It Mean?
Midwife-
It’s Atrocious!
Trigon-
Born with Dread!
Midwife & Trigon-
Like A Flaming, Bloody, Ruby The Baby Is Unnaturally—
All-
Red!!
Trigon-
Take it away. Take it away…!
Starfire-
So you see—it couldn’t have been easy!
Crowd-
No One Mourns The Wicked
Now At Last, She’s Dead And Gone
Now At Last, There’s Joy Throughout The Land
And Goodness Knows
Starfire-
Goodness Knows…
Crowd-
We Know What Goodness Is
Starfire-
Her Life Was Lonley…
Crowd-
Goodness Knows…
Starfire-
Goodness Knows…
Crowd-
The Wicked Die Alone…
Starfire-
She Died Alone…
Crowd-
Woe To Those Who Spurn What Goodness Is They Are Shown No One Mourns The Wicked…
Starfire-
Good News!
Crowd-
No One Mourns The Wicked!
Starfire-
Good News!
Crowd-
No One Mourns The Wicked! Wicked! Wicked!
Starfire-
Well, this has been fun. But as you can imagine, I have much to attend to, what with the Wizard’s unexpected departure. And so, if there are no further questions—
Person In The Crowd-
Starfire! Is it true—you were her friend?!
(The Crowd gasps in disbelief. Starfire freezes, completely thrown.)
Starfire-
Uhm… Well, I… I… Yes.
(The Crowd gasps)
Starfire-
Well, it depends on what you mean by “friend”. I did know her. That is, our paths did cross. At school… but you must understand it was a long time ago… and we were both very young…
YOU ARE READING
Wicked: Teen Titans Style
HumorI thought this would be a cool thing to do! I love the musical Wicked and you already know my obsession with Teen Titans. LOL So if you can't already tell, Raven will be Elphaba, and Starfire will be Glinda. And of course I have to change a little b...
