Knocking On Your Heart // ongoing

3

  It's the first day of school and I'm dressed in a white v neck with black tight jeans. Every first day of a new grade level, I'll always wake up extra early to get ready for school. I like it better when I'm prepared, more confident in myself.

  Daddy was making coffee and Julia was eating her sandwich by the time I come downstairs.

  "Morning Magpie." My dad singsong.

  "Morning Dad." I slipped down to the seat across from Julia. She got her hair french braided. There's a thing about us Davine girls, we took the first day of school very seriously. For me, I think it's because the first day is a new chance, new vibes, new opportunities. It just holds a lot of hopes. But for Julia, I think she's just happy, more energetic that usual because she's excited to see her friends. That's different between Julia and me, I'm not excited to see anyone.

  I almost forgot about the whole Alina-Peter little picture scandal when Peter ran up to me and Jo during gym class when we were doing the fourth laps.

 "Hey, can we talk?" he got the intense look on his face, ones that he made when he was trying to figure out theories from his favorite tv shows.

"Yea sure" Jo crossed her arms.

  Peter rolls his eyes. " I want to talk Maggie in private."

  I can already guess what's he's going to talk about as we walk back to the tent across the court.

  He turns to look at me with the same intense look.

  "Maggie, I know about the whole picture thing, I don't know how Alina got it, but what I'm trying to say is that I didn't cheat on her."

  "Righttt...so, technically you're saying kissing me is not cheating on her because you guys hooked up afterward?."

  He sighs as he says " I'm sorry I kissed you, to begin with, and, um, thank you for covering it for me, saved me from her rants."

  Now it's my turn to give him the intense look. " Peter, I just don't understand, why would you kiss me when you were just going to hook up with her right after? I mean you must feel something for her to sleep with her right?."

  He sighs, again. I hate it when people sigh during conversations, it's just rude, like if you're so exhausted then just fuck off and don't talk to me.

  "I don't know, I guess it's because you've kind of disappeared from my life ever since high school started-" he look down to his hand, shameful with his action perhaps.

  "I don't know about you Peter, but that kiss means something to me, you can't just kiss someone like that and just, brush them off." I glared at him with hard eyes, even though I'm feeling soft inside, if I'm not grabbing to the tent pole beside me, I would probably fell to the ground by now.

 "I'm sorry." No you're not.

 "For kissing you, I regretted it..." oh.

  My heart drops to the ground, literally, I could hear the loud thud from it. Did he really just use the word regret with me. It hurt coming from someone you care about, regret. That kiss sparks something inside me, it stayed for the rest of the summer and till now, it's the start of my crush on him. But for him, that kiss is just a mere mistake he made one summer.

  He's still talking, still giving me the sympathetic eyes. "I mean, after all, these years, you've changed so much, you've grown to be so different nowadays, it's like I'm talking to a different girl. So I thought I might try if I feel something" He rush his words out.