Unreal Realities - Creeypypasta x Reader - Book 2

Chappie 5 - Refusing Refuge

There are an infinite amount of ways things could go. I've seen them all. There's been more than one occasions where I repeat my mistakes or forget to remember not to do them. It's not as easy as I looks, doing things different every time just to see how they would go, begging that they would be different. But these hopes always proved fruitless. There are people that I've once cared about and love and yet right now, they don't even know or care about who I am.

It's sad really. You don't know how may times I've wanted certain people to come back into my life. I miss them. I miss them so much. I've had children. I've had families. I've had complicated and high paying jobs. I've had a vast amount of knowledge... I still do. But I don't have them. They, who were my family, everyone. There were so many people I loved. Hell, I had grandchildren, great grandchildren, and families who loved me and I loved back.

I still want them all back. I want to go back. But repeating it... It's to hard. When they don't remember who you are... When they hardly even care... I can't make it through that. I can't see the people I care about forget me. They never understand when I tell them about what we've been through. I always have to start from scratch when ever I enter a new life.

Sometimes I feel like I should have never been on this earth to begin with. Who knows, maybe my mother was a jackal that gave birth to me, a demon. Maybe I was the daughter that satan never wanted and now he rapes me of all the hopes and dreams of the happiness I always wanted. Heh, maybe I'm just over dramatic. Then again, I would be hell to have restart everything with the people you love.

The Creepypastas are the only ones that I've ever repeated with. Their company... It's obviously different than most. Because I've gone so crazy, they're the only ones I can relate to. But, sometimes their different, like I've discussed with them before.

I hope they can do something... anything to help me stop this endless loop I've been stuck in. It's not fun, no matter how much I try to make it seem. The only way I can cope with myself is to make a joke of everything.

If it weren't for the voices in my head that distract me from reality, I wouldn't be able to handle this madness. I still try no matter what. I try to get through all the pain, get through all the drama, and to get through myself.

Sometimes, I can't even handle the stupid shit my mind makes up. I feel useless, y'know? No matter how much I've learned, I still only cause destruction and death whether it be myself or others.

My minds wanders from topic to topic. Some would call it stupidity while I see it as an escape from myself. The only time I ever think is when I talk to the voices. It's hard for me to contemplate properly. With all the things that I've seen and done, it's understandable. I act stupid a lot. Like, a lot. It is my fault, I know that, and I'm okay with it. It's better than having to remember everything.

To remember all the things that I've done. The people I've killed. And even worse, the people I've loved. I hate it. I really do. I just want to be with the people I want the most but then I realize that I can't see that person again because I was left behind. I don't want to live anymore yet I was cursed with nothing but life. It's not as entertaining as I make it all seem...

It wasn't so hard to understand that the trip to Splenderman's mansion would be in secrecy. Even the trees had ears that would speak to the wind, that would speak to Zalgo, that would send his forces to end the possible uniting of two clans.

Y/n followed Slendy outside. Jeff and Toby seemed to be joining them, both being some of the strongest and skilled Creepypastas. Although, Jeff didn't seem to happy about having to protect Y/n after what she did to him. Toby was angry as well but not as much since he never felt anything. Y/n walked closer to Toby, not really caring about personal space but she didn't invade it anyway.