Falling is the easy part (Camren)

6

Lauren:

The cold shower hadn't helped. At all. She was still all I could think about. And obviously not just in a purely platonic, non-sexually charged, friendly way. Nope, this was one hundred percent sexually charged. And very un-platonic and unfriendly. I definitely don't go around thinking about any other of my friends like this. Although saying that, the majority of my friends are lads anyway and I've never thought about a lad in anything near a sexually charged fashion.

But Camila, she is definitely very sexually charged. The definition of sexy. The most undeniably sexy, drop-dead gorgeous, heart-stopping-ly beautiful girl I've ever come across. What with her toned legs and defined shoulders that had wrapped around me, pulling my body into hers...

STOP IT.

This is ridiculous. Why is this affecting me so much? Not a single one night stand I've had before has played on my mind like this is. No girl has ever got to me like this. Ever. I threw my pen down again, giving up on making notes for like the fifth time already this afternoon. I'd been trying to distract myself from my hideously dirty and slightly inappropriate thoughts for hours, but nothing was working. Even reading up on Jane Eyre was reminding me of Camila. All it took were the words 'female power' and my mind was flooded with her muscular body pushing against mine. Clearly feminist literature is not the ideal thing to be studying when you're hung up on the hot lesbian sex you had last night.

Hot lesbian sex with the hottest girl alive. If I wasn't so pissed off about what had happened this morning when we woke up, I'd been doing a little celebratory dance or patting myself on the back or something. I had, after all, taken Camila fucking Cabello to the very heights of sexual pleasure. And judging by the sheer volume of her moans and the amount of times she came, she definitely enjoyed it.

But she clearly does not want to know. At all. I don't think she could have got out of here much quicker if she tried this morning. She didn't even want to talk to me, let alone touch me or kiss me. And her face when I offered her my hoodie for the walk home, it was like thunder. I was only trying to be fucking nice for fucks sake. It's not like I was suggesting I brand her with the words 'I shagged a girl' or anything. I just didn't want her to walk home in the rain with hardly anything on, that's understandable right? She could catch a cold or something.

Lauren Jauregui will you fucking listen to yourself?!

She's just a girl.

Just like the fricking Bronte sisters, now get back to your fricking working and stop thinking about her. I picked my pen up and stared at the text book resting on my knees on top of the duvet, hoping that, through some miraculous power of mind control I would just learn the words on the page effortlessly. It was no use. Mind control wasn't exactly my forte and I couldn't get her out of my head. The Bronte's just aren't doing it for me tonight.

She isn't just a girl.

I've got it so bad. I might as well face it. I didn't want last night to be a one night thing. I hadn't wanted that from the moment I felt her lips on mine. I hadn't wanted that when I led her to my bed, hastily removing her clothes. I hadn't wanted that when I woke up to find her beside me this morning.

But she was a walk of shamer, the love 'em and leave 'em type, the female Jay. She had so obviously just wanted a one night thing. Maybe she was that bad, she just needed to get laid, and it didn't matter that I was a girl, she was still getting satisfied.

Shit.

"Lauser, you in babe?" Jay's voice echoed through the flat, followed by the slamming of the front door and I was pulled from my thoughts. Probably for the best, before I get totally worked up and cry or something.