It's been over a year now
I'm pretty sure I first met you in key club freshman year but I didn't really know you
I actually first met you in August of 2015
On the first day of school
Our English teacher told us we could sit anywhere
And you chose to sit right next to my group of friends
Because everybody except me knew you
You were just a stranger then
Oh how nice that was
I spent the entire first day of school, maybe more, trying to figure out if the third letter of your name was a B or a D
Because that's how well I didn't know you
But even after the first day I could tell I liked you
I was positive you were going to, at least, be a great friend
You were what I was missing in life
Something I didn't even know I needed
Through the week we got closer
A friend asked me if I would ever date you
And, of course, I said yes
One day I walked into our English class and we were assigned to pick a group for a project
And you immediately came to mind
And when you came into class you didn't even have time to register what was happening before I said
"I want you"
One of the things in the project was to come up with scenarios and ask your group what they would do if it was them
Mine was something along the lines of
"If you were gay, how would you tell your parents?"
That was my way of seeing if there was an actual possibility of us happening
And you said "well i'm not gay so i don't know"
So I dropped it
Eventually you told me the truth and we started talking
I could go through every memory that I have of us together
And fall in love with you all over again
But that isn't the point to this story
I saw a picture one time that said
"I guess you know it's over when you are more in love with the memories than the actual person"
And that's the point to this story
When I see you I think "wow I miss her"
But that doesn't mean I want to date you
As of now I never want to date you again
But when I think of the memories of us
Or your hair
God knows I'm in love with your hair
I think "man I really love her"
My resolution for 2017 is to apologize, forgive, accept the outcome, get closure, and start over
And the only way I know how to start over without you, is with you
I just need to get some closure on this situation so I can move on
I want to be able to say hi to you in the hallway
Or be able to talk to your girlfriend because she seems really nice
I want her to be able to have some peace of mind
Instead of thinking that I'm going to try to get you back
I want her to be okay with me
I want both of you to be able to be my friends
All I want
Is to be how we were when we first met
We were strangers
We knew nothing about each other
But you were also my best friend
