i n a m o r a t a ✓

GREEDY LOVER

1

H O W could she not? How could she not remember you? She meant that in a literal sense, for no matter how hard she tried to forget, she somehow saw you everywhere. Even as his hands explore the faultless skin that is the delicate exterior of her soul case, she thinks of your hands instead. Your soft fingers had never touched her in a way that was sensual but only purely platonic, even still she longed for your hold.

He traces the smoothness, relishing in the fact that there are no burns, no scratches, no scars−for they are internal. What he doesn't see, what he doesn't see is the deterioration of her flesh, the rattling of her bones, the coldness that now runs through her veins, the hollowness of her fractured heart, the flame that is setting a fire to what is central to her existence. Her vessel is broken, but he only sees perfection.

He explores her like a traveler would the world. With bright eyes and a yearning to find places they've never been. Trailing lightly down her spine, he goes even lower down her thighs until his finger finds the jewel worth much more than a greedy man.

He gives her what he thinks she wants and she moans. No not in pleasure, but in sorrowful agony for what she really craves. And what she craves is not him. When whimpers escape from the back of her throat he assumes they are sounds of harmony from the immense satisfaction she feels. So he hovers over, and then they collide. His eyes are cloudy, as if he's drowning in the thrill of being inside her.

Suddenly she sees different hues in the sky. The sun is setting behind the trees. There's a lake reflecting the prepossessing sight of two teenagers sitting with toes dipped into the water and hands centimeters away from touching. You and her are the teenagers. While you're staring at the scenery in a daze, she is staring at you. And at the tender age of sixteen, that's when she first realizes that she's in love with you and always will be. You're oblivious to it all though. You then turn to her, whispering,

I n a m o r a t a  look, it's beautiful.

And all she could do is continue to gaze at you in the same way you gazed at the scenery and say,

Yes, yes it is.

Reality engulfs her, but she doesn't want to let the memory go. She gasps. Grunting, he speeds up. She flinches slightly, but he doesn't seem to notice. And once he's hit the high she could never reach with him, she calls out in pain, while he calls out her name,

I n a m o r a t a , I love you.

It's like a curse. Her mind screams he sounds so w r o n g , because it will only sound r i g h t , when spoken from the lips she can never k i s s .

N O T E . I would just would like to inform you that she's not being raped. When I say, she calls out in pain, I mean she's filled with an unbearable emptiness so deep that it can never be filled, not even by the lover she's with, which causes her to hurt mentally but not physically.

References to remember,
She/her = Inamorata.
You = The person Inamorata can never have.
He/him/his = The lover Inamorata is with.

Each chapter is with a different lover for Imorata has many, although none of them can fill the void. The story is supposed to be leading up to the reasoning as to why Inamorata can't be with the person she loves.