Hatred Never Looked This Good (Young Justice) [1/3]

25 | Lost

*Slight mature content warning*

I don't believe in the existence of angels
But looking at you I wonder if that's true

METROPOLIS
Jan 1, 02:40

I rubbed my eyes, feeling the headache pulsing behind my eyes. My mind was numb after the onslaught of reporters demanding to know the status of Pyrrha and me. I was able to give a believable tale of simply being taken in the moment of the tradition of the New Year's Kiss. But on my way to my apartment, I couldn't get Pyrrha off of my mind.

I tried my best to leave her. To resume our partnership on the professional level but seeing her in my office angry and hurt, I felt something. I wouldn't say it was regret or remorse-it was more the selfish need to be the one to make her smile again. Relationships, even sexual ones, had nothing to offer me but I would be lying if I said Pyrrha didn't intrigue me.

I hardly noticed her as Jet Starling before she showed me--along with Superman and Batman--her replication of my soon-to-fail solar technology. Even as she met her end, I watched from my office-bored. But as she was reborn as Pyrrha, the plan to take her for the Light's purpose practically formed itself. Her anger made persuading her to serve the Light entirely too easy-but so was losing control of her.

Headstrong, but intelligent, Pyrrha instantly took command of the slack I had given her, demanding an audience with the Light. I found myself consistently underestimating her and enjoying being surprised by her-even when she kissed me for the first time. Pleasantly surprised actually.

Whether we realized it or not, we began meaning more to each other. During Light meetings, I had to fight the urge to fixate on her stoic demeanor and when her aide failed to protect her during her fight with the Justice League, I had Sportsmaster dispose of him purely out of anger.

That night, we bluffed and postured until we hit the point of no return at which Pyrrha attempted to leave. Selfishly, I convinced her to stay only to leave her to wake up alone. I left that night from fear-an emotion I was unaccustomed to feeling. Fear of becoming attached to her. Fear of having a weakness. Because I knew something about Pyrrha and that fact kept me from getting too close to her.

I am not yours.
Not lost in you,
Not lost, although I long to be.
Lost as a candle lit at noon.
Lost as a snowflake in the sea.

The plan was to ignore her. Avoid her. When she surprised me in my office, it took everything in me to keep my eyes on the papers in my hands. When I did make eye contact with Pyrrha, her pain was obvious as she attempted to keep her red glow completely controlled. I knew I wasn't strong enough to maintain contact with her. But I found myself on the balcony watching her, feeling something similar to jealousy as the elites fawned over her. I was a fool to convince myself that this relationship was ever strictly professional or that it could ever be again.

After realizing that, what else was I to do but take the last dance of the year-our year-with her?

Exhausted, I quietly entered my apartment knowing that if Pyrrha was still here, she would be sleeping. The speakers softly played a piano piece as I saw that she spent her time playing on our chessboard. I chuckled lightly that she had won again. Walking into the bedroom, my tension from the evening melted as I studied her shape under the purple silk sheets with 'The Art of War' next to her. I gently brushed her black hair off her cheek and smiled as her skin involuntarily glowed brightly at my touch.

"Lex?" She said groggily.

"Go back to sleep, darling," I said as she twisted and stretched drowsily, glowing under the sheet.

"Not without you," she smiled coyly as her eyes opened, glowing in the dark room.

"I have to contact Savage."

"I already did. Manta is ready," she said hurriedly. "Now come to bed."

"Darling, I have to unwind or I'll toss and turn."

"Need a stress release? I'll do all the work." Her voice grew deep with lust making my body stiffen. She floated out of the bed slowly, letting the silk sheet slide off of her body. Her bright red eyes locked onto mine, challenging me to break her gaze but I didn't want to play that game right now. I never wanted to pretend to not see how beautiful she was again.

You love me, and I find you still
A spirit beautiful and bright,
Yet I am I, who long to be
Lost as a light is lost in light.

She began undoing my tie and shirt as I tried to memorize every curve of her. She truly was gorgeous. The nouveau riche saw her as a novelty item, something to hashtag, but I saw her as something more. Something to worship. I didn't believe in a god or gods or any religion besides capitalism but I believed in Pyrrha. She was what the world needed. She was what I needed.

Oh plunge me deep in love-put out
My senses, leave me deaf and blind,
Swept by the tempest of your love,
A taper in a rushing wind.

I reached to her porcelain face and softly rubbed the apple of her cheek. Her body froze and her eyes widened in shock as I skipped our ritual of 'Pyrrha, May I'. Her eyes softened and closed as she leaned into my hand, making my heart ache as I pushed aside the thoughts of the implications with our 'friends' in the Light.

"What are you doing to me, Pyrrha?" I whispered. Her eyes opened revealing her deep red eyes and smiled as if she held a secret.

"Getting you Lost." She leaned in and spoke softly on my lips. "Happy New Year, Lex."

---

Team Year Six
WATCHTOWER
Jul 10, 20:30

As I stared at my bandages in the Terra Room, I thought about how much I had endured this last year. Somehow, I kept ending up on death's door because of people I loved. Used, lied to, betrayed, hated, feared, imprisoned, murdered. I was healing on the outside but on the inside, I was a mess. I wanted so badly to go back to when everything was going my way. When Lex and I were happy. When I was a powerful member of the Light. When I didn't rely on the hospitality of my enemies. But life never stops. Especially not when things are good.

Looking back, I should've just stayed in that damned soggy cardboard box.