Chasing Our Dreams [f.a]

Grosser Preiss von Deutschland, Nurburgring

~ AGE 22 ~

BUDAPEST, HUNGARY

''Do you remember it, London?'' Fernando asked me, somewhere around 11 p.m. in my hotel room, just the night before Hungarian Grand Prix.

It was Season 2003, what I like to call - Fernando's first real Formula One Season. He just replaced Jenson Button for a place on the grid, Jesnon switched to BAR Honda. Everyone back in Great Britain thought that was a dumb move, but Flavio Briatore cooked it all up. He was the one to find Fernando, he was the one among us to believe in him.

Flavio Briatore is the one person I will be grateful for the rest of my life.

''What are you talking about?'' I raised an eyebrow. There were so many things to remember, he needed to be a pit more precise.

''Before my first race, when I came to your room, scared as hell?'' he lighted up my memories.

''Yeah, I was talking to Shane.'' I nodded.

''If we weren't in Australia and he in America, I am still pretty sure he would have kicked my ass.'' Fernando made me smile. ''Where is he, by the way?''

''Memphis. NBA. He made it, just like you did.'' I sighed. ''We don't speak much, I haven't heard from him lately. But you know, one can't live in America and not know what's going on it the League - football, hockey, basketball, baseball, whatever. Even though one is not interested. And he is an alumni, and I spend most of my days at Duke. Still.''

''Is it still hard for you, amiga? After all these years?'' less than 24 hours before his race, Fernando asked me about my ex boyfriend.

''I haven't had anybody ever since. You know how it was. It comes and goes - waves of missing him.''

*** FLASHBACK ***

~ AGE 19 ~

OVIEDO, SPAIN

It was mid Season, 2001. Fernando Alonso was on a summer break, three weeks Formula One drivers always get during the season. He was part of Minardi team, without any points scored up until then. But he was good.

Flavio managed his career well, and by the time, he had all cards on the deck. Fernando was given the opportunity to go back to Renault Team, wait a season and test for them, and then get it.

''I'll get rid of Button'' I remember Flavio saying after the last race of the first part of the season. ''We just need his contract to end.''

I felt bad for Jenson, after all he was a Brit. I had to root for him. But when it came to choosing, I would choose Fernando over myself, so I was loud and clear - let Jenson go, he'll be fine with another team.

I finished my second year at Duke, and I was the best student in class. I was still doing my thing. Worked at the Cafe, draw my scetches and studied.

Shane left. He graduated and kissed me goodbye. I watched him being picked for Vancouver Grizzlies, and helped him pack his things to go to Memphis. Grizzlies were moving from Vancouver to Memphis and so did my boyfriend. By the time he got to Memphis, he was already my ex boyfriend and my heart was shattered to pieces. Rosalinda hugged me, and tried to help me heal, but I will never forget what she said.

''Pack your stuff and go to Oviedo. He is the only person you could be with right now.''

She left for the summer, too. She said she's going back home, to try and find Juan Pablo somewhere in Colombia. Life was a joke for her, she was a great student, her love life sucked more than mine, but she had an amazing family and she wanted to spend some time with them. Meeting Juan Pablo Montoya would just be addition to her lovely life, but that didn't happened until couple years later, when he was still wearing blue and white jump suit - and my best girlfriend came with me to see the race.