Among the Asgardians: The Goddess of Love

Ready, Aim, Fire.

Kathryn's POV *Present Time*

*contains a scene of rape. I left the worst of it out, but the before and after scene is still kind of graphic.

I awoke with my head spinning. I could feel the very last tendrils of my “childhood memories” on Earth slipping away. All that was left was the cold, hard mess that was my true past. Gone was my other reality. All that remained were the horrors. Unfortunately, there was a dim light that illuminated my dark past. The only bright spot had been Loki. New, gut-wrenching pain shot through my entire being as I opened my eyes.

My surroundings were dank and dark and disgusting. Water dripped from the ceiling and a clear inch of grime covered every available surface. I heard the rumble of something above me and realized I must be in New York City. The noise was a subway. I tried to scream for help, but there was a silver muzzle clamped over my mouth. Despite my foul environment, I wore a clean, silver, silk dress that had to be Asgardian in origin. I continued looking and noticed that my wrists and ankles were held together with duck tape. I tried to struggle but it was useless to try to break free without my mouth. A brilliant idea shot through my mind like lightning. I needed Loki for this one.

“Excellent. You are awake,” he laughed, entering the room. “Your friends will be here in moments.”

I tried to speak but the muzzle made it impossible. Fine then. I had a fully-functioning mind. How long was I out?

“About three days. Darkhold takes a long time to remove. I tried undoing the love spell as well, but it’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. Jacob did a good job on you.”

You’re just bitter. It isn’t a spell. What I did, I did of my own free will. You left me without bothering to find out any of the details! What choice did I have, especially once I found out I was pregnant? The baby needed a father and I didn’t know you were coming back. It took me months to grieve your departure from my life and even though I became comfortable with it, I still never stopped loving you. But now I’m married to Jacob and I’m fully in love with him as well. That’s something no spell could ever change.

“Shut up! Shut up, you whore!” Loki screamed. His eyes turned red and his body turned a cerulean-blue color. “You think that thought hasn’t occurred to me? You think I don’t worry that it isn’t Darkhold? That it’s real? That was my greatest fear when I sent you to Earth. I worried day and night when I worked for Thanos to gain you back that you would find someone else you liked better than me. That was the thought that kept me going. That was the thought that pulled me through when I was down. It was you. It’s always been you. When I was on Lidelse, the lack of oxygen started to cause me to begin to rot alive. I lost weight. I was only a week from death when I came to Earth. I pushed myself within an inch of my life all so that I could get you back. Now, you’re carrying the child of a man who isn’t me and it hurts.” A tear gathered in the corner of his eye.

I looked down at my left hand. My wedding ring was still on my finger. Loki hadn’t removed it.

“I guess that’s why I tell myself you’re under a spell. It makes your love for him less painful for me. If it’s his fault, I have someone to hurt. If you love him of your own accord, I have no one to hurt but myself.”

A tear fell down my cheek. Loki’s words had completely ripped my heart from my chest and cast it to the grimy floor. Now I knew how Clint felt every day, knowing that he had led Bobbi to kill herself. The horrible, crushing guilt resounded inside my body, rattling my bones and ripping my nerves. Loving two people at once was torture. Pure torture.

Bruce said the baby might be yours.

Loki froze, tears still streaming down his face. Now, however, there was a glimmer of hope. “Mine? How do you know?”