I Wont Fall In Love //Joshler//

VIII

***Wait to start song***

-Tyler-

I let a few weeks pass and I never did hear back from Josh, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to keep true to my word. I was going to get better. Withdrawals have been a pain in the ass and I was fighting tooth and nail not to go back to those old habits. I haven't touched a lick of alcohol or cocaine.

Then again I haven't even left my apartment since that day except for work or grocery shopping. I guess you could say I 'had my fun', but now it was time to actually try fixing things. At least for myself.

I got my online classes set up and was working on getting my high school diploma through it. I'd be finished in about 6 months which is sooner than I would've been still in a public high school. I sat down on my couch a cup of coffee beside me on the side table and got working on classwork. I had to write a paper that was due tomorrow and I still had to go to work tonight.

Matty had stuck around after Travis and Brad were murdered, apparently he wanted to make sure I was safe. Although I appreciated it I was weary about his constant presence. He was still the same old Matty that I met the day of the 'party'. I was trying to keep away from the scene, but we had a weird relationship I guess you can say.

He wasn't my boyfriend, but he wasn't exactly a friend either. We did couple-y stuff together like kissing and cuddling. Holding hands. Basic stuff, but it never went further than that. I wouldn't allow it. I wasn't going to lose my virginity to a druggie. No offense. Not while I'm trying to better myself.

He stayed with me and honestly I've decided I'm not really fond of him he's kind of an asshole. Especially when he isn't high or drunk. He was a money moocher and he never helped pay the bills, but I guess I was afraid of being alone again so I dealt with it. I accepted that I could probably never do better than him, but I was also hoping that maybe if he saw how much better I was doing he'd sober up as well. He's been in this scene a lot longer than I have though so it probably wouldn't be as easy for him.

Hell it was hard for me and I was only in it for 6 months at the most.

I heard shuffling coming from down the hall and looked up to see a disheveled Matty appear in the walkway.

"Morning." I greeted looking back down at my barely completed essay. "Coffee is made might have to warm it up though. It's been sitting for about an hour."

"Make more then." He replied gruffly.

"Are your hands broken?" I retorted looking back up from the laptop.

"Tyler. I can't even see straight and you expect me to make coffee?" he said leaning against the doorframe. I sighed some as I put the laptop beside me and got up from the couch.

"Well maybe you shouldn't be out so late partying. Might do you some good to actually stay in the apartment for once. Ya know maybe we can have a movie night or you could help me study."

"As if." he scoffed. "I didn't ask for advice, I asked for coffee."

I didn't reply as I rolled my eyes and made my way into the kitchen. I dumped the pot of coffee and replaced the soiled filter with a new one before getting the coffee out and began measuring and tossing it in the new filter.

I jumped slightly when I felt arms snake around my torso and link in front of me. I continued measuring anyway. He rested his chin on my shoulder after placing a kiss on it.

"I need more money." he said indicating that I should give him some.

"What happened to the money you had yesterday..? Don't you sell? You should have money. Besides, I just gave you an 'allowance two days ago." I sighed getting out of his grip as I pressed the button for the coffee to start brewing and I turned back around to face him.