They Weren't Kidding

Chapter 6

I decided after however much worrying that I should just stay friends with her. Being aromantic made the process easier than it probably would have been otherwise. I was fine with staying friends, though something in me wanted us to be more. I wanted to date her. I wanted to be the one that went to movies with her and had my arms around her waist as she leaned against my chest. I wanted to be the one to walk around with her in public and hold her hand in mine as our fingers were laced together. I wanted to be the one she kissed and held so close when she was down. I wanted all these things and yet they felt so far out of my reach. But, I was fine with it. Or at least, part of me was.

I decided it would be best to not tell anyone how I was feeling and play everything off as best as I could. I managed to keep people from knowing, that includes Ryan herself. There were quite a few times, though, that I was confident she would be able to tell that I liked her.

For instance, New Years' Eve of 2015. My family was throwing a party for some of our close friends as they did every year for quite a while. I decided I would invite Mordy and Ryan to join in the festivities. However, I also invited Ryan to spend the night that night, to which she agreed to. As the night approached, I began to get more excited with each passing minute.

Ryan showed up to my house before any of the other people who were meant to be there that night. I received a message letting me know she had just pulled up. When she knocked on the door, I ran to answer it. I wanted to be the one to let her in and show her around. When I opened up the door, I saw her and the moment I did, her face lit up with a bright smile.

"Hey," I say to her as I open the door wider for her to walk in. Ryan followed my gesture, walking in before I close the door behind us. She hugged me when I turned around.

"Hey," she returns as I hug her back. We let go and step away from the door. "Where should I put my bag?" she asked, holding up a small bag that I assumed held the things she needed for the night.

"Oh, you can put it in my room. Follow me," I instruct, heading towards the stairs so we could go to my bed room. Ryan followed close behind me. We reached my room and I opened up the door, letting her set the bag she was holding onto the floor. "Alright, let me show you the rest of my house."

I led Ryan back down the stairs and showed her the kitchen and the family room where my parents were still setting up for the party. We didn't spend too much time there. I brought her back upstairs to show her where the washroom was and where we would be spending most of the night which was the game room.

"Oh, cool. You guys have a pool table?" Ryan asked first thing as we enter the room. It was understandable as you see it right as you walk down the hallway as it is in the view of the entry way to the room.

I chuckle a small bit before replying, "Yeah, my dad got it a while ago. It needs a bit of tuning, though. The table's a bit off-balanced and you can't make good bank shots. The sides have gone soft through the years we've had it, but I mean, it's still usable."

She turned around and looked against the wall next to the doorway, "And a table hockey?"

"Oh, yeah. We hardly use that, though. It's more on the cheap side and was a hand-me-down from a family friend. We can still play, if you want to, though," I say, reaching for the plug to turn it on.

The night went on, more people showed up to join the party. Mordy eventually made it as well as some of my other friends. A group of people my age all hung out on the balcony for a good portion of the night. I introduced everyone to each other to make conversation go a little smoother between the two sets of people who were mutual friends with me.

When the night had struck 11:59, everyone was called downstairs to partake in watching the ball drop as we each had a glass of sparkling apple cider as it was an event with minors. As the countdown to midnight came to a close, Mordy, Ryan, and I stood with our glasses in our hands, awaited to celebrate with everyone else.

"Sorry," I hear Mordy say before everyone finished the countdown by calling out the number "zero." I turn to ask him what for, but as I looked over at him, my heart sank. I had managed to look at him and Ryan right as he had captured his lips with hers. I looked away before I had seen too much.

I was glad when the night came to a close and people began to leave, including Mordy. As the majority of the people left and I felt no obligation to stay out in public anymore, I walked back into my room and closed the door as Ryan said goodbye to Mordy. I laid down on my bed and let the scene of the two of them kissing play over and over in my head. The more I saw them meet each other's lips, the sadder I became. After a moment, I felt tears begin to roll down my cheeks. Before I could keep from crying, Ryan walked into my room and noticed I was upset. I sat up when I saw her. Before she said anything she looked down at my ankle and noticed a dark red patch on my black jeans.

She seemed to know exactly what the patch was and the reasoning behind the discolouring on the cloth. She said nothing but got down on her knees and rolled up the ankle before I could protest. The moment the pant leg was past the ankle, I knew it was too late to stop her. I just laid back down. Ryan left the room and I didn't know what to think. She walked back in a moment later with a paper towel that she had put in the sink to wet it down.

"What are you doing?" I asked, as got back on her knees and began to wipe at the red lines that were still slightly fresh. "Ryan stop, please."

Ryan merely looked up at me, giving a small genuine smile before continuing despite my continuous requests for her to stop. This only caused tears to well in my eyes again. The only time she stop was when the evidence of what I had done was gone. She, then, stood up and placed her arm around me, pulling me into a comforting hug which I did not protest.

That moment lasted a good bit before she and I settled down in my bed, laying side by side. We spent the night telling each other about things we had each experienced in our past as well as other things. At one point, Ryan laid her head on my chest. Immediately, I felt my heart begin to race. I was so nervous and excited that the girl I had a crush on had her head on my chest. I placed my arm off to the side of her.

After a moment of silence, Ryan spoke up, "This is awkward."

Immediately I felt incredibly embarrassed. "Oh, sorry," I said as I moved my arm farther from her, thinking that was what she meant by her statement.

She didn't say anything about it afterward, which I assumed confirmed my suspicions. We laid there in silence for a while. Before I was aware of my movements, my arms wrapped themselves around her waist and I held her closer to my chest. By the time I knew what my arms had done, it was too late for me to do anything about it so I remained in that position. Ryan mentioned nothing of it, causing me to think she was okay with it. The night went on through the next day. Ryan went home and I was alone to ponder my thoughts once again.

I had no clue if Ryan had any feelings for me that night, nor would I know for a while. Despite this, I kept the memory of the night in my mind, making me happy for a good few months.

n>�~UAtY8