Seeing so much death that you become numb.
Hearing so many lies, that you become one.
Getting broken so many times that you are what your heart is.
Becoming paranoid because of the lies, that you become insane.
Insanity is when you do something over and over again expecting different results.
That's my life. My love. My happiness. My feelings.
I try to feel.
Try to love.
Try to be happy.
Try to be me.
Try to find me.
Try to be perfect.
I eat. I am more or less healthy.
Physically yes, mentally...that's a different story.
Left alone to my shouting demons.
Left alone to self help my depression.
Left alone to deal with myself.
Positive people come and go.
No one ever stays.
Haven't connected with anyone in forever.
Given up on practically everything, and everyone in real life and online.
People tell you to rise above the depression and demons.
But what's the point, if all I do is come crashing back down?
There's no cloud nine.
No, happy place.
No nothing.
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Sorry, I don't know...it's probably bad.
1-29-17
