demons | nash grier

chapter four

from the outside

the two of them both knew it, deep down, that they were falling for each other.

nash was falling apart, but continued to smile for the fans and everyone else who loved him.

arianna, despite having cameron, didn't feel right in anyway. in fact, she too was falling apart and no one seemed to notice.

arianna

i walked to the park and sat on the swings, taking a deep breath as the wind blew my hair. for the past 2 weeks, since nash left that day, i've been falling apart. tomorrow, the boys go back to magcon, and you'd never guess where.

san francisco, california.

i went onto twitter, going to nash's profile for the trillionth time today.

"@Nashgrier: walks are good to clear the mind"

so he was doing what i was doing.

i heard footsteps approaching, and i looked up to see nash walking my way, but his eyes were at his feet. did he know i was here, or was he just walking to the same place i go to clear my mind? i froze momentarily, unsure of what to do. do i leave? do i stay and hope he doesn't see me? my heart started to beat faster and my hands started to shake.

"nash." i said quietly when he was close enough, and he looked up at me, his eyes bloodshot and extremely glassy. he was a wreck. he went to turn around, and i got off of the swing and followed after him, grabbing his sweatshirt sleeve to turn him around.

"please don't tell me i'm the reason you're like this," i whispered, and he looked into my eyes.

"i wish i could," his voice was equally as low as mine. a tear went down his cheek, and i reached up to stop it, his hand grabbing my wrist hard as i touched his face. it caught be by surprise and my eyes widened.

"you've done enough, please don't make me think that you love me, arianna." he said coldly, and i shook my head, my hand still on his face. he shut his eyes as another tear fell, causing my eyes to water as well.

"but i do." i said as quietly as i possibly could.

"bullshit." he laughed humorlessly, moving my arm away from him forcefully, scaring me a little. "you're dating my best fucking friend."

"nash, i love you." i spoke louder, and he shook his head, looking down. my heart pounded and without thinking, i flung my arms around his neck and kissed him, every emotion i've held inside the past months coming out into the kiss. he kissed me back, hands on my waist and pulling me as close as he could to him. this was so wrong, but it felt so right.

"please come to my house," he whispered, pulling out of our kiss. i nodded in agreement.

cameron

san francisco tomorrow.

i walked into my kitchen with a big smile on my face. san fran was arianna's hometown, so i needed everything to go perfect and as planned there.

for my arianna.

i put my phone to my ear, waiting for her to answer. it rang about 5 times before going to voicemail.

maybe she's sleeping?

it's 4:30 pm there, dipshit, I don't think she's asleep.

i assumed she was taking a shower or cleaning, maybe even taking a nap. she's been pretty down lately.

yeah, that's what she's doing. don't get worked up over nothing.

nash

"ari," i whispered to the girl with her head on my chest. she looked up at me, and for the first time in awhile, i had a genuine smile. i had her.

"yeah?" she wrapped her arm around my waist and put her head back on my chest, playing with my fingers.

"do you actually love me?" i asked, and she froze.

"there isn't a single doubt in my mind that i love you," she responded, continuing to mess around with my hands.

my mind went over the past two hours, everything going by so quickly.

we walked into my house and straight to my room, shutting and locking the door behind us. i picked her up by her waist and set her on my bed, heart racing faster than it ever has as i pressed my lips onto hers, her hands finding their way to my hair as she fell back onto my bed.

i was on top of her, my hands reaching at the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, kissing her again. i've craved this moment for what seemed like forever now, and now that i had her i never wanted to let her go again.

but she still wasn't mine.

no matter how many times she moaned my name or screamed that she loved me as i thrusted into her, with her hands pulling at my hair... she wasn't my girl.

and it hurt. it hurt to know that even though we did one of the most intimate thing in the world, she wasn't even my girl to do it with. she was cameron's.

i just had sex with my best friend's girlfriend.

"and ari?" i ran my free hand through her hair, waiting for her to respond.

"yes?" she asked, and i grinned.

"don't forget about cam."

arianna

i gave nash a hug as i walked into my house, my parents not even minding that i had been gone. typical.

my heart raced as i thought about today. i slept with nash. i cheated on cameron. so many girls would hate me if they knew what i had done. i started to feeel disgusting just thinking about it. tomorrow, nash would be leaving for san francisco. i wouldn't see him for a week.

cam 😘❤️ - babyy are you okay? you haven't responded 😔

"aw cutie were you worried? 😏 i'm fine ❤️" i answered, the guilt slowly overcoming me. i wasn't guilty because i loved Cameron. i was guilty because i love nash, but was dating cameron.

but still, i couldn't wait for the moment i could finally meet cameron. i had so many scenarios in my head of what would happen, although i knew it would probably be really awkward for awhile.
cam 😘❤️ - yeah i was!! 😒

"well i'm fine babe, i'm sorry for scaring you ❤️❤️❤️" i pressed send and went into my bathroom, taking off my clothes for the 2nd time today and climbing into the shower.

i felt better after taking a shower, even though i could still feel nash's grip on my waist no matter how many times i washed my body.

nash grier - good night, i love you ❤️

"i love you too, goodnight ❤️" i replied, right as another text from cameron came in.

cam 😘❤️ - i can't wait until i meet you honestly i'm going to hug the heck out of you

"hug the heck out of me? aww ❤️" i responded. it was only 9:15 pm, but i was tired from earlier and honestly, i needed a good nights sleep. it's been awhile since i've gotten one.

cam 😘❤️ - yes heck hahaha, i love you

nash grier- i really do love you a lot.

and again, i was torn.

i had cameron , but i wanted nash.

but i wanted cameron, too.

just not in the same way.