my darling ➸ s.m

Prologue

Prologue- Haylee's POV

There's always a word that ruins happiness for someone. Whether it's something you're afraid of such as, sharks. Or maybe it's something you dislike such as, homework. No matter what word it is it ruins your happiness, and inclusively your life.

My word is literally taking my life away from me, tempting my body to stop functioning. Someday temptation will win. Someday my body will stop working. My word is cancer.
Honestly half of me is afraid of cancer and despises it so intensely.The other half of myself loves cancer so much, it produces it. I'm killing myself.

I was diagnosed with colon cancer five years ago. It was very tough for a ten year old girl. Cancer is not as anyone expects it to be. They think us-cancer patients- are strong, bold warriors. When we really are not; we cry ourselves to sleep, and we spend most of our days thinking that dying is pleasent. Sooner or later we know we will die anyway. Everyday I go on thinking if I will die today or tomorrow or the day after tomorrow. I find the idea of death perplexing. I would rather die than suffer.This is just too prolonged and extremely painful, death would be less

It's mildly unpleasant having the thought of dying in your mind 24/7. But one day I will die, just like everyone else. Everyone dies, nothing will be able yo change that. My turn just came sooner.

The treatments didn't work. Chemo took my hair off, not my cancer. My hair is back, but cancer never left. Cancer is like a guest who came to my house, and opts to stay. It is stroking my hair softly waiting for the perfect moment to kill me- I suspect that will be hella soon. Everyone knows it; no one admits it. Although, I already got a wish offered by "The Wish Co." Which grants the cancer kids a wish and blah blah blah. They do that when you will die, when you are a lost case.

Then my wish kicks in. I'm stupid and fangirly over asking for this. I know I am. I could've used my wish for a new treatment, but I decided if I will actually only live a few more weeks, I'd better waste-or spend, decribes better- my wish on my angel singing to me.

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my darling was the first magcon fanfic about cancer. and yes, i'm proud of my baby :') oh and olivia holt plays haylee richardson (let's just pretend she has greener eyes)

-nat