my darling ➸ s.m

Chapter 31- SM

Chapter 31- Shawn's POV

I walked nervously to Haylee's room, surrounded by the guys and some of their lovey-dovey girlfriends. Love was all around. Tay and Ally, just being this sweet bandana couple. There was also Sav and Jacob who facetimed like all the time and always held hands. Even though it was hard to admit, even a thirteen year old- Hayes- found love before me, giving occasional kisses to Kayla on the cheek.

But I'm waiting for Haylee. And that will be worth it.

My hands were so sweaty, clenching tight the small fist I had for Haylee in my fist. I was flushing. I couldn't wait to see what Haylee will say when I present her with the gift.

"Can I go in first?" I ask, shyly because I knew the boys would make fun of me.

"Uuuu...why exactly?" Asked Nash, a mocking tone on his voice.

"I just...it's none of your business." I replied, stern.

"Alright, lover boy, but hurry up we need to go to the mall." Said Gilinsky, knowing how- since today was Haylee's release and she could finally leave her room- we had planned going to the movies.

Without saying another word, I knocked for a second in Haylee's door and then entered. She was tying her blue, high-top converse. Haylee was wearing a black 5 Seconds of Summer tanktop, as I knew she loved the band, and some light jean shorts. For a while, she was just looking down at her shoe, tying the knot slowly- failing because of her trembling fingers. She was sitting on her bed, frustrated, and not noticing me at all.

"Let me help you." I said, kneeling down and tying her shoe- I was no longer nervous, my hands were not sweaty nor shaking anymore.

"Thanks, Shawn. Like I just feel so nervous. What if I forget my doze of pills while we go out again?" She asked, worry in her eyes.

"You won't, I'll take care of you." I said, we hugged- for seconds barely. I wanted it to last more, but I was the first one to pull away.

"I have a gift for you, Haylee. I know this past weeks have been hard for you, and I just wanted you to know that I'm here to support you through all and that I love you. You're a great friend of mine," I was internally debating on whether or not to add the last part, but I did. I was supposed to not be in love with this girl.

I handed her over the necklace, it had my blue guitar pick hanging from it. On the back, you could look at my sharpie-handwriting with a small font saying 'love you Hayls -Shawn.' She held the necklace unto her chest, and gasped from excitement. Haylee was crying and smiling, and then just rushed over and hugged me so tight.

"Thanks, Shawn. It's just so lovely." She said grinning, holding the necklace.

"But you're more." Oh god, I'm so cheesy.

"You are even more, so...can you please help me a bit and put this on?" She said, handing me the necklace.

Haylee held her hair up with her hands, and turned her back towards me.I put the necklace around her neck. She sighed, and turned around. Haylee was so close to me, only centimeters apart, as I was right in front of her. I felt her chest banging against mine, mine also against hers-probably.

We were awkwardly there. Just staring at each other, I barely able to breathe- our breathes mixing, hers smelling like grape jello. She looked so flawless up close. Haylee was smiling greatly, looking at me directly in my eyes. It was the first time I felt extremely nervous over a girl. Only Haylee made me feel that way, really.

My hands were again sweaty. Her green eyes stared into mine. We were so close, even more when she leaned in forward- not intending for a kiss, maybe just to take a look at me a bit closer. Who was I kidding? Hell yes, I wanted to kiss Haylee.

So for a split moment, I doubted myself. Are you even good enough for her? Does she even love you back? What did you even do right for her to love you? Would she kiss you back? Or push away? Would she be disgusted? Would she not talk to you again? Ever.

Better not risk it.

"Let's go, Hayls, Tye just send me a text saying it's time." I said, fake glancing at my phone, pulling away.

"Alright then." She said, grinning but a bit shocked. Because seconds ago we were so close together, almost kissing.

"Ladies first." I opened the door for her, giving her a small smirk.

"Thank you, my gentleman." She said, laughing. Oh what a beautiful laugh she had.

We were on our way to the mall, Johnson driving. All of us jamming to One Direction's 'Midnight Memories.' I stared at her singing, completely euphoric and- surprisingly-on tune. Haylee waved her hair back and forth, pretending to be a rockstar. A gorgeous one, of course.

I wasn't really singing or keeping up with the obnoxious motions everyone was doing. I was just thinking about our almost-kiss. I stopped it. But I kept wondering.

Next time would I also do?

~~~

Reading this far? Comment 'Matt loves Nat.' You guys, Haylee and Shawn were going to fucking kiss hajekwm. I just needed to bring a little action. Will Shawn kiss her next time? Ayyeee idk either.

So beautiful, I hope you had a great day, and if you have not: well just know I love you and that your smile is beautiful.

I'm dedicating the chapter to a bunch of people so therefore here's my list:

1) Sarah❤️ Oh my gosh, you are just such a talented writer and you are an amazing friend. I love talking to you, you are just lovely, alright? I love you tons alright. Thanks for all the support.

BTW YOU GUYS GO READ HER AMAZING FANFIC SHATTERED ON HER WATTPAD PROFILE 'SARAHBEANAMAGCONBOYS.'

2) Sav❤️ you know I love you so much and that you are one of my bestest friends ever. Thank you for all the support, I remember you were always there and omg we have come so long. Even longer is to come.

3) Marlu❤️ You know how much I love you. And you know how much I care about you. You will probably not read this but idk I felt I needed to dedicate you a chapter bc I just appreciate you in my life so,so much. You understand me so well & you deal with my weirdness at school so often & yet I'm still your bestie. I love you very much.

4) You❤️ yes beautiful you, reading this dedications from across a screen. I would not be here without you, and I appreciate that so much. I really thank you like wow I love you so much. Plus, I owe you so bad. Thanks for all, you make me smile.

Next chapter's dedication will go to someone who comments the Matt/ Nat thing😏

Well ily gorgeous ok bye xoxo,

Nat❤️