Prodigy Agent 09

Chapter 10: Shut It Away

          "Agents, I have received a new mission. Agent 09, you will join Agent 01, 02 and 06 to field and agent 08 and 10 will assist you while 06 will guide you through it." Gray announced and I nodded my head in response. It would be my first mission and I hope that it would turn out good.

          "The job is simple and easy. But not easy and simple." Leo tried to humour me but I just gave him a blank stare.

          Brandon cleared his throat, "Stop it but know we're there as long as we can, Olivia."

          "She'll do good." Gray nodded at me and I nodded back.

          "Where are, we heading?" I asked.

          "Mesrald." Gray answered.

          Leo grinned in response, "I heard there's a very good looking prince there... But he's not very loyal... Be careful, darling."

          I rolled my eyes and nodded. Well Mesrald, here we come...

          "So, you're actually a Prince..." I asked cautiously, treading through the conversation carefully.

          Adrian nodded in confirmation without hesitation, "Prince of Mesrald."

          I shot him a bemused glance, "You can't be... Mesrald has another family in there now..."

          "Those are my uncles and aunts and cousins. I don't ever want to step foot in that castle ever again. I'd rather stay as a Knight of Aslade." He gave me a loop sided smile, it was as if it was not such of a big deal. But I saw that mixture of sadness and relief in his eyes, that was when I understood.

          Nodding my head, I gave him a small and faint smile... There is always once or twice where we will just want to give up and run away from our problems, this world, this life... When opportunity arises, some takes the risk and jump or escape; others who are braver, tries to hang onto that thin thread... But I left and so did he. I guess we are not as different as I thought we were...

          "I met a girl when I was younger... But I never found her again... She meant a lot to me, she showed me light during the dark, she showed me concepts that adults can't grasp upon... Somehow, she saved me from myself. With her words, her actions... She never apologised, she never pitied me nor treated me as if I were a piece of glass..." Adrian glanced at me before he continued, "And somehow you look so much like her... From your appearance to your personality... I guess that was why it was hard to let you in... I was scared..."

          At that time, I was stunned and I cleared my throat, "I didn't mean to cause-"

          He interrupted me, "I know... I was just scared of you getting close to me and leaving me yet again... Guess it's too hard to resist you..." Giving me his looped sided smile, he breathed in deeply as I twirled my fingers.

          "I lost... I lost people too... Perhaps it's the reason for my cold demeanour... I can't bring personal issues to the job so I will not be sharing... I can't... I'm sorry." I apologised sincerely, because I truly felt that pain and the lost in my heart aching again. I rushed off without hearing his reply, slamming my bedroom door shut. He need not know but I was that girl. The one who picked up his books, the one who slept over his house, the one who scolded him when he stole her food, the one who promised never to leave but broke it in the end...

          It was as if all the beasts and demons chained inside for years were unleashed from prison and they were all gnawing and tearing at my mind, trying to take over my weakened state. Confining them was torturous and painful. I wanted to cry, scream, thrash around and just die... However, silent tears made a path down my face, the ugly truth tearing my esteem down as I fought against the merciless demons... Begging for control. This was the only time I am going to be weak... Only when I am alone. Crying was a weakness, a weakness that I should never bring it up again. I allowed myself for mistakes but never the same again... Shut them away... Shut the feelings away... Lock it up, chain it, throw it away...

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