Oh, Dan

Chapter one

"It's true what they say: you never really know what you have until you've lost it. Phil was my best friend, but i never realised how lucky i was to have him until he... he..." I fixated my eyes on Phils parents, "he was truly an amazing person and he will always have a place in my heart.".

I stepped down and gloomily walked back to my seat. PJ then walked up to where I was previously stood and delivered his eulogy. After, he sat back down next to Chris.  I couldn't help but be jealous of how lucky they were to still have each other- and i have no one now.

After the funeral had finished, everyone left the church and started making their way down the street to a pub for the wake. I couldn't how they could all party after a funeral. Phils mum came up to me and hugged me. "He loved you a lot, you know?" she whispered and then pulled away from me. I smiled at her and she turned away to walk with her family.

Chris and PJ came up to me next.
"Hey bud, how you holding up?" Chris asked.
"I've had better days." I sighed miserably, "I think I'll just go home and be alone for a while." I said.

PJ looked at Chris with a concerned face. "Come with us to the wake, you need company." PJ said.
I suppose it would help to be around friends. I started walking in the same direction as everyone else and PJ and Chris followed closely behind.

As we arrived at the pub, Chris and PJ left me to go and talk with Phils family and share their happiest memories of Phil.
I walked straight to the bar and ordered a drink.

"Dan? what are you doing here?" A familiar voice asked. I looked over to see a woman with blonde wavy hair. Oh no. This was one of the women I had a one night stand with!

"hey .... you" I replied awkwardly as I couldn't remember her name.
"It's Grace," she reminded me.
"so why is the pub so busy today?" She asked
"well actually it was somebody's funeral today" I answered taking another sip of my drink to try and forget the pain.
"whose funeral?" She asked.
"A friend.. His name was Phil"
"oh" she looked distraught. Why is she so upset? She didn't know him at all...did she?

A few drinks later, I was starting to feel a little tipsy so I decided it was time to leave. I told grace that I had to go to which she jumped up and offered me a lift home. I accepted her offer and she drove me to my apartment, but the strange thing is that I didn't need to give her directions, she just somehow knew where my house was. But as I was so drunk I didn't care.

As soon as I got inside my apartment I heard the doorbell buzz. I went down and answered the door. It was grace again.

"Hey so my car just broke down. Do you mind if I stay here for the night?" She asked.
"Yeah sure but um you'll have to sleep on the couch." I said and started walking back up the stairs. Grace followed me and made herself comfortable on the sofa.

I fetched her some blankets and pillows and then left her alone for the night. As I walked to my room I lifted my hand to know on phils door and tell him that Grace was staying the night. Then I remembered that he wasn't here, so I sighed and lowered my arm.

As I crawled under the black and white covers of my bed, I heard footsteps approaching my door. The door opened and Grace stepped inside. I don't think she realised that i was awake as she almost jumped half a mile when i asked her what she was doing in my room.

"oh, Dan, I was just checking up on you to see if you was okay." She replied and sat next to me on my bed. I sat up and sighed, "i'm not doing great." I admitted.

She put her hand on my leg, "do you want to talk about it?" she asked leaning closer to me.

I leaned away slightly, "you didnt know Phil, you wouldn't understand." I said and moved my legs so that she would move her hand away from me. She frowned and placed her hand on my leg again but further up my thigh. "Forget about Phil for now," Grace started leaning in again "it's just you and me. Let me help you forget." Her lips pressed up against mine and her hand carressed my cheek. Inside my heart i knew that this was wrong but I needed to feel love: to avoid my feelings of grief and forget Phil.

I broke away from the kiss and looked Grace in the eye. I brushed my hand through her long, blonde hair and leaned in for another kiss. I leaned backwards onto the bed and she rolled on top of me.

It felt good to have someone to hold and to love.