Holy Crap I'm Sasuke!

Wave

I grinned as we left the village. Finally going on the 'Wave' mission. Wonder what I can do differently than canon?

The old drunk behind me looked exactly as he did in the anime, complete with cheap alcohol in his hand.

Naruto looked waaaay cooler. He wore the same outfit he'd worn to the weapons shop, only with his new trench knives attached at his hips. 

Sakura even began taking her own training more seriously, but she still let 'inner bitch' yell at Naruto every now and then.

Kakashi was the only one who remained mostly the same. Steadily reading his book. I actually read over his shoulder once. It's anew average smutty book but the words Jiraiya used were just fucking childish. '... And so Igikaru took hold of Nari's boobies and began to giggle...' I'm not sure Jiraiya has ever had sex now...and that's just super depressing, considering hes old as balls.

Then I saw it, the puddle. If I were honest with myself, I'd say I hadn't noticed the puddle when I watched the anime as a kid, but now that I thought about it...it was kind of obvious

I covertly dug into my pouches and slipped two shuriken into my right hand and brought them behind me.

Instantly I charged them with lightening chakra and hurled them. The ass holes in the puddle leapt up, trying to dodge the shuriken. Luckily I had charged them with electricity and used my chakra to create an electromagnet. The slower shuriken caught on the magnetic field of the faster one and changed direction, flying upwards as the two were leaping back. The shuriken had gained a bunch more speed and they couldn't dodge til their feet touched the ground anyway. So one of them, I honestly can't tell these cock gobblers apart, the one on my left, caught the shuriken with his eye. Not the most effective way to catch, but still counts, right?

He screamed bloody murder as he fell forward onto his hands and knees.

His brother didn't even get a word out before I'd punched a hole through his chest with the chidori. He looked horrified as I stared him down, sharingan blazing.

Then I channeled extra power into the chidori, and forced my arm upward. The motion, cupped with the extreme heat and cutting ability of the chidori killed the man nearly instantly and left a steaming hole in the man.

The brother with the bloodied eye was kicked in the face by Naruto and held down by the blonde's foot. The blonde tried his best not to look at the gore scene I'd created but I wasn't having any of that shit. "Naruto, we're ninja. You're gonna have to get used to this. If I hadn't stepped in, they could have gotten to you, Sakura, or the drunk bastard they were trying to kill."

The one under Naruto's boot cried out angrily. " You bastard! You killed Meizu!"

I scoffed. That made the loudmouth here, Gozu. "Yup, but I'll bet that if he were to look deep into his heart, which is currently all over the ground, then I'm sure he'd forgive me."

Gozu struggled to get up but I spoke again. "What in the name of fuck did you think would happen? Let me guess, your plan was to ambush us, take out Kakashi, and then kill the bridge builder in front of us? How stupid are you guys? Kakashi could have killed you and we never would've seen it, his lazy ass was probably testing us to see how we'd do against real opponents. So Sensei, how'd I do?"

Kakashi eye smiled. "Very well actually. We only need one for questioning and you only killed one while incapacitating the other.  Maybe you should consider the anbu program once you're a chunin?"

I shrugged. Sounded cool, but I kinda still wanted Aphro-chimaru to teach me... decisions decisions... fuck it, if I leave the village, blonde will shirk his training to try and rescue me.

After a few more hours of walking, Naruto(randomly) threw a kunai into the bushes. A small white Rabbit leapt from the bushes, running off.

"Dammit Naruto! You missed and I'm getting hungry as a Akimichi before breakf- wait why is that rabbit white?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

Kakashi cursed. "Get down!" I dragged Tazuna's ass down so he didn't get decapitated.

The sword stuck firmly into a tree and a pale man with average muscle building and a mask even Kakashi wouldn't wear landed on it.

I chuckled. "You do realize, that instead of the lame ass theatrics you could've pegged him with a kunai. That would've saved you from fighting Sharingan Kakashi, it's not like he could've chased you with us slowing him down. If he continued, your partner in the bushes could help you beat him or use us as hostages."

Oh the LOOK that Zabuza gave me was the one of mind fuckery... I love doing that.

Zabuza chuckled. "You're good, brat. Able to sense him when most seasoned jonin can't? It's impressive."

"Actually I can just see the future." I smirked, activating my sharingan.

Kakashi pulled up his headband, playing along. "Most people think it's a rumor that the sharingan can do that. You die here today Zabuza."

I'd already used a chidori once today, that left me three more before I would need to stop. I pulled my bow from the seal on my wrist and summoned an arrow. With my sharingan slowing things down for me, I could just tell how much it would help with archery.

I fired the arrow at Zabuza, catching nothing but air as he vanished, his speed almost as great as Kakashi's.  Luckily I knew where he'd end up. I summoned another arrow and spun, stabbing into Zabuza's bicep as he appeared. From the arrow missing to me stabbing Zabuza took just over a second by the way.

Zabuza cursed, slapping me like he were a super human Rick James, and had to block as Kakashi appeared, kunai ready to kill. If it hadn't been so cool, I'd worry about the fucking clicking in my jaw, hurt like a Canadian hooker...