Endings Are New Beginnings (Book 1) (Completed)

Part 51

I stare down into the empty glass in my hands. One turned into another and then another when I didn't feel an affect. As the more I had, the more numb I felt. My vision was getting more fuzzy, and my head was getting lighter. I find myself reaching for the bottle again, but pause. I shouldn't be doing this, I need to be sober and there for Sophie, but at the same time I want all the pain to go away. I slam the glass back onto the table and cover my face with my hair. A knock sounds at the door followed by Trystan calling out.

"Knock Knock, you ready?!" My head shoots up as I push the hair out of my face. I push my chair back and stumble towards the front door, my foot catching on something causing me to trip. I hold onto the side table, knocking a lamp off. Crash. I start to giggle, finding the whole situation funnier than it should be.

"Is everything okay?" Ashton calls. I push myself to my feet, swaying slightly but continue onto the front door. I unlatch the lock and pull the door open. I am met with three of them, all of the gazes turning sympathetic when they see me.

"You've been drinking." Ashton states. I bring a finger up to my lips with a giggle.

"Shh." The slur in my voice makes the short sound, I was meant to make, longer.

"Oh buttercup, let's try and sober you up." Jesse says pushing past the others and into the flat.

"N-No." I protest not wanting to feel the pain all over again. I'm suddenly reminded about the cameras watching my every move. I walk back to where the glass and bottle are, picking the bottle up wanting to pour another glass. As I pour it my hand begins to shake as I hear the gunshot from earlier today all over again. I bring the glass up to my lips, for it only to be pulled away by Jesse.

"Hey! If you wanted your own, just ask." I pout reaching for it. The bottle is taken from me as well. I grumble, but deep down I'm grateful for them taking it away.

"You're too good for me, I don't deserve you." I mumble trying to sit on the stool behind me. I put my head in my hands. "I'm not a good mother. I don't want to be like my mum, but I'm turning into her by resorting to drinking."

"Don't you dare say that, you are an amazing mum, you've just had a traumatic time." Trystan says getting angry.

"It's still no excuse." I say quietly getting upset.  I see Jesse walk into the kitchen behind me, rifling through the cupboards. Ashton brings out his phone typing away. Trystan focuses on me, walking closer until I'm craning my neck up at him. He bends his head down so he can look at me in the eyes.

"I don't want to hear you beating yourself up. If you want to blame someone, blame Tanner." He instructs. I bite my lip when I realise how close we are. I feel myself getting hotter, probably from a mixture of his proximity and the alcohol going through my system. The moment passes as Trystan steps back but the heat doesn't. Wanting relief I reach for the hem of the shirt I changed into when I first arrived. I get it halfway up my body before Trystan notices and pauses my hands, a strained look on his face.

"Leave your shirt on, princess."

"But I'm hot." I protest.

"I know, but you'll regret it later." I know that if I was sober right now I wouldn't even think of taking my top off around them. I would be too embarrassed. I let out a loud sigh as Ashton walks over to us.

"The others know what's going on." He lets us know. I watch Trystan turn to Ashton and start talking. I see an opportunity, and take it. I bring the shirt up over my head, throwing it to the side. My skin is still hot, so I reach for my trousers. I unbutton them, and shimmy them down my legs. I feel only slightly cooler, but a big grin comes onto my face at getting a small victory over them. The conversation slowly stops when they see me in my underwear.