Sorry

Every Horror Movie

Horror movies can be exciting to watch but sometimes they can be quite funny. I find myself yelling at the screen a lot because some of the character's common knowledge is nonexistent. So here is some rules.

Rule 1: Don't go into the forest! It's dark and filled with evil. You can't even see that far. And if you're running away from monsters then you're going to get lost. Just run down the street or into the city instead.

Rule 2: Don't investigate. "A ghost! Let's stay and learn more!" no. "This new house looks creepy. Let's prove it's not!" no. "Someone died here. That's not so bad." wrong. "I think I saw some dark shadows and monsters in the night." move. If your house is creepy or you think you saw something or it has a history involving death. Don't learn about it or prove anything, move!

Rule 3: Don't be too scared. It's a doll! Kick it! Rip off it's head! Find the weakness! Or if there's a monster/enemy show it that you're aren't scared and it should be. If you do that you could win.

Rule 4: Don't trip on air. Just run normally. You don't need to trip on smooth ground.

Rule 5: Don't open the closet. You heard sounds you know there's something in there so DON'T CHECK! Or else it'll kill you.

Rule 6: Don't go separately. If someone went alone and hasn't come back then they're dead. Don't send another person by themselves or else they'll die to. "I hear a sounds coming from the forest. Jimmy go see what it is." Jimmy goes. 10 minutes later. "Jimmy isn't back yet. Bob go." 10 minutes later. "Bob isn't back yet. Tom go." 10 minutes later. "Tom isn't back yet. I'll go." he goes. He dies. They did it wrong.

Rule 7: Don't split up. Then you're easier targets. Just don't do that.

Rule 8: Don't trust the voice in the phone. So it's the voice counting down the days until you die. If it's counting down then think that's until you get a pony or something. Or just scream "No! Wrong!" Or start counting back at them. Or say zero really loud then say "Bet you didn't see that coming. Where is my pony?!?!?!"

Rule 9: GET UP! MOVE! "No its coming at me!" stand up and run idiot. "Go without me!" get up. "Its getting closer! Ahhhhhh...!" Then run or move or get up! Seriously! I actually so a show where a remote controlled machine gun got closer and closer to a man. Did he run? Nope. Just stood there and screened until he died. In the same show some women fell then crawled instead of ran away. Worst part, she was crawling from a tractor.  Get up and run idiot!! You can walk faster! IT'S A TRACTOR!

Rule 10: Choose your hiding places well. Dont hide in the closet, they will check there. Dont hide in a closed of room, you trapped yourself. Just leave the house or hide in a room with weapons and an escape door. Come on.

Rule 11: Use common sense.

Thank you friend for a bunch of these.