Suus Lux, Sua Nox.

♕ chapter six ♕

I laid in pain while screaming. It hurt so bad, if Ares was my second mate' he could help me. Unless my wolf denied him.

I groaned throwing all the blankets off the bed. They made me feel claustrophobic. 

I winced when my body came back down on the bed. "Athena!" I screamed while tears fell down my face.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry here drink this tea it will take some of the pain away"

I took the coffee mug from her hand and drunk the tea like it was a shot.

"How much longer" I groaned while striping my shirt off of me.

Female wolves don't hide their bodies from other females. All the she-wolves shift together, so there is nothing uncomfortable about being able in front of another she-wolf.

"Approximately 24 more hours"

I groaned and took my pants off. I was left in a sports bra and underwear.

"Why don't we run you a bath to take away some of the pain?" I nodded eagerly and hopped out of bed.

"I smell him on you" I growled out. As we had become closer, I could smell Ares.

"We were downstairs talking and he started to get upset. He was upset because he couldn't help you so I gave him a hug" she replied as if it didn't matter.

My wolf started to growl and fighting me for control. She wanted blood. She didn't care that it was his sister, all she knew is he had been touched.

'calm down grey, he's not even our mate'

She didn't listen so eventually I had to put up a wall.

"Are you okay, amaria?"

I nod as I stepped out of my clothes and in to the tub. I signed with relief. The pain hadn't gone away completely, but it was so much better. We had to keep the water going to make sure the bath wouldn't get warm.

She left me to go call her mate. That had made my wolf calm down enough for me to ask questions.

'is he our mate?'

'I need time before I find our second mate amaria!'

'I need to forget just as much as you grey! You are being selfish! You know he can help us'

She stopped replying making me angry. I would assume he is but I'm too afraid that I will be wrong.

I sat in the bath crying. I cried for the pain I felt from the heat. Buy I cried mostly for the mate I had lost.

I was determined to come back better then before. I wanted to be happy again. To be carefree and to smile. I was tired of not sleeping or Eating. I was tired of feeling like I couldn't breathe.

I was tired of hating myself, for wondering if I was good for anyone, or if anyone would love me again.

I felt as if I worthless, as if I had no one. My wolf would barley talk to me. And if she did it was a quick conversation that would end as soon as it started.

I started hating the way I looked. I wanted, no I needed to look like Lilly. I needed to have short blonde hair, and baby blue eyes. I needed the defined face and the tall, slim figure. I need to be everything she was.

I wanted to feel pretty and confident. I just wanted to be everything my mate wanted.

'stop saying that' my wolf growls at me.

'shut up grey, I'm tired of you. You barley talk to me anymore, I have no one.' I screamed at her.

Maybe it was the rejection or the heat but something had made me snapped.