The Fallen Angel

Chapter XVII

I felt empty. My Dad had noticed, Sarah had noticed and most of all, I had noticed. I saw it in the mirror in the morning and when I went to bed at night. In an instant, the life had been sucked right out of me and I was left an empty shell, threatening to be blown away by the wind and shrivel away.

"Would you like another one?" the bar maid asked. Sarah had convinced me to make a fake ID in hopes that I would follow her into bars. Who knew I'd be sitting there alone at three in the afternoon. I was about a month away from turning eighteen so it wasn't that big of a stretch. I nodded, rubbing my tired eyes. I could only picture my Dad's disappointed face if he ever caught me. But it didn't stop me from taking a sip out of my third bottle today. She eyed me suspiciously a few moments but decided not to question me. Maybe she felt pity for me.

It was Sunday and I had a ton of homework to finish but I just couldn't sit down and do it. And believe me, I tried. If I told myself, six months earlier, that I would be in a bar mid-afternoon, missing Satan himself, I probably would've started drinking earlier. I hadn't heard from him in about a week. Nathan either for that matter but I didn't want to see him. I had been dodging Sarah's calls, too. I just couldn't handle lying to her anymore so I decided it would just be easier if I ignored her until she decided she had enough of me and moved on, just like everyone else had.

I took a sip of my beer and pushed away, resting my head in my hand. I hated beer. I looked around. There were only a few people, most of them over fifty and in desperate need of a run. A few were eyeing me and I turned away, asking for my bill. She printed it out and handed it to me. I glanced at it and gave her the money, digging out the change in my back pocket.

As I was about to step off the bar stool, she spoke up. "It gets better," she said, wiping off the counter. I nodded, and left.

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I stood under the hot shower for over an hour. I closed my eyes and let the water flow down my back, over the wound that was beginning to heal. I felt a little woozy from the beer and had hoped the shower would help me sober up a little.

I made it downstairs, my wet hair up in a bun and a warm sweater over my shoulders. My Dad was sat on the couch with his glasses on the end of his nose, reading the newspaper. He glanced up at me a few seconds and went back to his reading. We had gone out to buy a Christmas tree the day before and it was put straight, ready to be decorated. I used to be the first one on the job. I loved Christmas. But now it didn't feel as special anymore

"I think the ornaments are downstairs in the storage room if you want to decorate it," my Dad said, never peeling his eyes away from the paper.

"Not today," I said distractedly. "I have a lot of things to do." My head was beginning to pound so I headed for the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water. I grabbed my phone on the counter and scrolled through. Thirteen missed calls and six text messages from Sarah.

Olivia, please answer me, one wrote.

This is really important. I need to talk to you, another said and I sighed.

I dialled her number and pressed my phone to my ear. She answered after the first ring, sounding out of breath.

"Where the hell have you been?" she shouted, making me move my ear from the speaker.

"I'm sorry, my phone was off," I lied.

"Can you come at my house?" she sounded scared. "Please?" she added when I didn't give her a reply.

"Alright, I'll be there in ten," I said and hung up. I grabbed my keys and coat and stepped out of the house. The ground was completely white now and the wind was cold. It was really beginning to look like Christmas. As I drove down the street, I looked at children playing in the snow. It made me miss being that age, where the only important thing was to have built the biggest snow fort on the block. I could've walked to Sarah's since she only lives a few streets away but I decided it was too cold and I was too tired to make the effort.

I pulled up into her empty driveway. I knocked a few times but I never got an answer. I turned the handle hesitantly and the door opened. It was unlocked.

"Sarah?" I called out. The house was completely quiet.

"In the bathroom," I heard her frail voice. I pushed the door open slowly, finding her crouched on the floor with her mascara smeared all over her cheeks.

"What happened?" I panicked, crouching down in front of her. The first thing that came to mind was Nathan. She started to cry again, trying to say something.

"Sarah," I grabbed her face in my hands. "Focus." She handed me a stick like object and I stared at it a second, my eyes widening as I realized what it was.

"I'm pregnant."