The Fallen Angel

Chapter XXIII

I had no one left to confide to. Sarah was gone, Lucifer was out of the picture and Nathan slowly slipped away from my grasp. I had pushed everyone away, or worse, driven them to their death.

I had called Sarah's mother the night before and she kept asking questions like 'how long will she be gone?' or 'where is she going?', things that I couldn't answer. She kept muttering under her breath 'stupid child, so ungrateful' and I held myself back with every part of my being from shouting through the telephone that her daughter was dead. Sarah was dead.

Her teachers asked me questions as well and I couldn't look any one of them in the eye as I lied to all of them. There was an empty desk next to me in Math and in Science too. I had overheard from Mr. Thompson that Nathan had dropped out of school. He kept going on about how good a student he was and how he didn't understand what happened. I broke his heart, that's what happened.

With Lucifer gone, there was no longer a purpose for him, which meant I could go back to living my life the way I did before. A few months ago, that would have been a blessing. But I can't go back now. I can't go back to my life in the dark when I know all that I know. No one can just leave it behind and move on without ever looking back. At least, I knew I couldn't.

"What has you so distracted?" my Dad asked and I raised my head. He sat on the ground in front of me, holding a small wrapped box with a bow on top. I looked up at the Christmas tree and back at him, forcing a smile.

"Nothing," I shook my head, looking away.

"Well, I got this for you. It's nothing big but I think you'll like it," he handed me the box and I eyed it curiously. I shook it next to my ear and he chuckled. I began unwrapping it to reveal a long white box. I opened it, a small locket shinning under the string of Christmas lights. "Merry Christmas," he smiled.

I opened the small gold locket and inside was a picture of my Mother and me when I was little. I looked up at him with an open mouth smile and he grinned so big the skin crinkled under his eyes.

"Well now I feel bad for just getting you deodorant and a hat," I laughed and he gathered me into a big hug. I sighed, feeling sad for him about what I was thinking. He knew nothing and he never would. He would always be the one to stay in the dark.

"Don't worry about that kiddo. As a matter of fact, I needed a deodorant and a hat anyway," he said and I laughed quietly. He pulled away and looked under the empty Christmas tree. "I would've gotten you more but to be honest, I didn't really know what to get you."

"That's perfectly fine Dad," I said honestly. "This is more than enough."

"How about I go make us some pancakes," he tapped my knee and stood up with a grunt.

"That sounds great," I smiled up at him and he walked out of the room. I slid the chain delicately between my fingers ad gathered the locket in the palm of my hand. I unclasped the hook and brought it around my neck. I let it fall on my chest and I opened up, admiring the picture. I went up to my room and grabbed her wedding and slid it on my finger. And then my eyes travelled to the address I had placed on top of my desk.

It was a beacon of hope that seemed just out of my reach. I knew how these things worked and what would happen but there was a small chance, a minuscule taunting chance that she was still alive. That she was somewhere, just out of my reach, waiting to be found.

My father's calls snapped me out of my trance and I slipped the paper in my back pocket along with the ring and headed downstairs.

We ate and we spoke about old times and how good we used to have it. We talked about my Mother without ever mentioning her name and I knew how much he missed her. In his head, she was dead. My Dad didn't believe in odds or chance. After a person is missing for nine years, the chances you find them are slim to none. My Dad knew that because he's seen it before. He's seen families being torn apart when their last hope of finding their child is shattered. He doesn't have hope, for anything. He crosses the bridge when he comes to it. But I sat there knowing more than him. Because I had a lead, but I couldn't tell him what it was.

When we were done eating, I snuck out of the house and got into my car. I knew what I was walking into but there was no going back. And I liked the idea.

I didn't have Lucifer to protect me or Nathan to stop me. I was all on my own, preparing to fend for myself. And I had never felt so free in my life. I wasn't scared anymore, and that's what made me dangerous. I wasn't afraid to die. I almost welcomed it with open arms.

I pulled the paper from my pocket and typed it in to my phone, my eyes raising to look at the road every few seconds. It was out of town, about forty five minutes away. It was an old warehouse and there wasn't anything around for miles.

I felt my phone vibrate and I looked down at it lying on the passenger seat. It was my Dad calling, he must have found my Mother's ring I had left on the table, along with a note I had scribbled. I only wrote 'I love you' after thinking long about what I could say. It was the only thing that was important for him to know. I couldn't leave with the thought that I'd never go back but there was a chance. And even if I would come back home, I'd never be the same Olivia that left that morning, whatever the outcome.

I began pressing on the gas, feeling the rush of adrenaline as I watched the road sweep under my tires. The roads were empty; everyone was at home for Christmas, sleeping in late and exchanging gifts. And it made me sad because I couldn't remember when Christmas had become just another day of the year. It used to be the most important thing in the world and now it meant nothing. I had my decorations up on November first, but this year, the tree was barely up for Christmas morning. I wasn't in a jolly spirit, if anything I was sadder then I was at any other time of the year because it was another Christmas that I wouldn't be spending with my Mom. But maybe that was all about to change.

I began to speed as I approached the the intersection. As I was about to cross it, the loud sound of a horn made me lift my hands away from the wheel in surprise. In a fraction of a second, I turned my head to the side and came face to face with a pair of head lights. I cowered away, shielding my face with arm, feeling the impact push me across the car. I smashed through the window and landed on the road. I couldn't feel my body and I looked up at the sky, my vision becoming blurry with every uneven breath I took. Snowflakes began to fall from the sky, covering me slowly as I felt myself fall into darkness.

And then there was nothing. 

Hey guys! This is the end of the first book! THE SECOND BOOK IS OUT NOW! The title is "Reborn" and it can be found on my profile! Also, I have a few other stories I'm working on if you want to check it out!

Thank you again for reading!

-G