Loving you (Book Two)

Loving you (Ch;3)

Kass P.O.V

She look's in the mirror, seeing big blue bags under her eyes. She wished she didn't see the things she saw.

She wished she could believe him when he said she was "Beautiful" or "Gorgeous". Or when he held her hand in the cold.

The way he hugged her tightly before and after work.

Just the small things she loved about him, Hurt her in the worst way. She questioned herself all day. Wondering why she gave so much thought into someone who didn't feel the same anymore. It truly was a clear answer he didn't feel the same. She took time and thought into witch made her even more depressed.

Until she couldn't eat or sleep anymore at night.

Until she began self harm and blocked everyone out.

Until it was too late and she was up all night crying.

Until she starved herself so much she almost died.

Until it was almost a last call, and that very moment could of been her last breath.

Then she met with people like her, people who could relate and not judge her for her rocky and lonely past.

She started eating two meals a day and running.

She even started going out keeping him off her mind. She drank often, and did some drugs. Not enough to remove that small nagging feeling in her heart.

She got better.

That's why today she didn't believe in love as much. Jay was her one and only, but he made it clear Zendaya was the one for him. So she moved.. after that long time she came back ready for that new start.

Only to find Jay needed her in his weakest time.

She stayed with him, comforted him. Like she wished he did when she was so badly messed up. She was there for him.. like he should of been for her.

Until it was time to leave and she left.

She saw him often and they became friends again.

That's why still to this day she was still in love.

"Kass?" Jay's voice echo's throughout the phone, "Oh sorry" She says blinking a bit and sighing walking out of her bathroom. "Are you okay, I mean you're not hurt or anything" He questions "No, I'm fine Jay just sleepy" She says hoping he doesn't catch the lie.

"Oh, I'll call you tomorrow Kass" He says She feels her heart break a bit and she nods. "Okay, talk to you tomorrow" and she hangs up before he can even mutter a word.

She walks into her bedroom, looking in the mirror above her bed.

All she see's is a girl with skin to pale, and ghostly eyes. She whished her hair had more beauty too it than just a blonde dull color.

She wished that she was a bit taller, and skinner. Seeing the few pounds she gained since she got better really weighed down on her in a negative way.

She feels tears start to bubble up, and she doesn't let them fall.

Not anymore, she was stronger that that. So she puts on that perfect smile and leaves the bathroom.

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Driving to town was hell, it was busy and crowded. Not too mention all the red lights she stopped at, the day had been long and boring.

She needed some sleep it was demanding.

She almost fell asleep two times, and she was sure the third time she would. She grabbed her phone and dialed Zendaya.

After a couple of rings she hears her voice.

"Kass hey !" "Hey" She says softly "What's up?" "Could you come over, and we could talk" She says hoping Zendaya would say yes.

"Yeah, sure Ten minuets sound good" "Yes, see you soon". And she hangs up leaving a deathly silence fall over her.

She is rushing home, hoping she will be there in time. Looking to her right she notices the time and lets out a breath. She has Four minuets.

She drives like a maniac until she arrives back at her shit hole house.

She hurries inside and turns on the lights, rushing into her living room she turns on her lamps.

A knock is heard and she is on thinking mode, today would be the day she would tell Zendaya everything.

She walks over swiftly and opens the door.

"Hey" Zendaya says hugging her tightly.

"Hey" She says hugging back, soon she lets go and shut's the door back. "So what's up?" Zendaya questions taking a seat on the couch.

"Can I tell you some things, that you wont tell anyone not even Jay or Val" She asks. "Yeah, of course what is it..".

Looking around her room, she nods to herself. Ready to get all this guilt off of her she looks back at Zendaya who is carefully watching her.

"I still love Jay" I say

Zendaya's eyes go wide and she look's at me with a shocked expression. I give her a few minuets letting my words sink down deep. Hoping she would understand and not through a bitch fit about it. She closes her mouth and looks at me.

"I see" Is all she says.

"What?" " I get it, go for it I'm sure he'd be all in for it" she mutters looking down at her shoes. "Really" I say hope filling in my every word.

"Yeah, Kassidy" She says smiling at me.

I let out a sigh of relief.-----~

We talk for awhile and I fill her in on things.

It felt so normal telling her things.

Before I knew it we had become really good friends and it felt great.

"So see you tomorrow" She asks giving me a hug "Yeah of course" I say rubbing her back. She says her goodbye and I shut the door.

I turn off the lamps and let a chuckle escape my lips.

Wow..

A friend....

I walk into my bedroom and close the door.

Getting on my laptop I sign into face book.

I search her name and add her.

Wow cheesy I know, but for once in my life I really had a friend who cared about me and my health.

And for the first time in forever .. I was truly happy.

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Here we are chapter three. I hope you enjoyed it. I had fun writing Kassidy's P.O.V And yes it is kind of depressing. It came from life experiences, So please no judging . Vote/Comment ? Bye ~P.S I spelt her name that way, it's different and I like it.