Loving you (Book Two)

Loving you. (Ch;19)

Never felt like this before, are we friends or are we more ? As I'm walking towards the door.. I'm not sure

Biting her lip Lilly stares out the window, it's been two months to be exact. Two months of looking at herself in the mirror making sure there was no bump, two months of missing Val and wishing they didn't get caught. In the end she knew that she didn't have a chance with him, she knew it but she still wanted it.

Little did she know, he did want it too. Mostly because he was lonely and felt like Zendaya left him, even though he knew she wouldn't. It was a thing where he couldn't control what happened so she went for it. After that she didn't feel quilt she just backed off too see how things were going.

She has been battling with herself for two months, wondering if she should call and apologize or ask him to come over to talk. Give him so coffee and see where they stood.. but she knew that was a bad idea because he wouldn't agree. He just got Zendaya back for crying out loud. He has something he always wanted why would he want to her ?

Because, he is desperate. Desperate enough to make Zendaya fall in love with him again, desperate enough to take advantage of her in this moment of weakness. On that level Lilly did feel sorry for the girl, she wished she could remember the real Val. Not the one that he has put up just for her.

Lilly could be pregnant and it could be his.. sadly. She didn't take the test yet because she was afraid it would read yes and all of her dignity would crash and fall around her. She isn't going to take that stupid test, she is just going to wait and if her belly get's bigger then she will have to come up with a plan.

Because Val wouldn't claim it, he wouldn't say "I'm your father" to her belly while she cried tears of happiness. That was the sad truth and this is why she should listen to herself more, sighing she wonders off into her bedroom and clothes the door. Rest was a big option right now and honestly she needed it.

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Change my mind~ played through Zendaya's speakers, dancing around the Val's house trying to clean off his things were tiring. So she thought why not put music on ? After all she was a dancer and she needed to atleast try. She realized how much she liked One Direction a couple of days ago when she was YouTube and You&I popped up and she clicked on it. It was amazing, soon she realized she had a crush on Louis. He was far to adorable not to have a crush on.. and Zayn god she was in love with him too.

The song ended, and she looked around the living room. 'not bad' she thinks and moves off into the kitchen.She felt like she needed to clean and help out with things because Val was being way to kind. Letting her stay here for free she felt like she owed him a lot of things and cleaning was one of them.

Honestly she didn't know where they stood, yeah they kissed here and there but he never told her what they were. She didn't even know what they were going to be.. and she was okay with that. Kissing wasn't a big deal anyway right ? You were just swapping saliva, kinda sounded weird but it was the truth.

But she would be lying if she said she didn't feel anything for him, because she did. She felt warmness spread through her body when he kissed her lips and nibbled on the bottom one. She felt like she might faint when he let his tongue dance with hers, it was a special feeling she liked.

Or when he just held her close and she felt special, even though they didn't go through the awkward stage of "what are we". Today was going to be different though, she was going back to her "house" because in all truth she wanted to be there and not bug Val that much anymore. Plus she wanted to sort out all of her feelings, they were all jumbled everywhere and honestly she needed a break from herself as-well. She was afraid though if she left Val would lose all feelings for her and just dump her like she wasn't nothing. So that's kinda what kept her from leaving as-well.

She rounded up all of her things, including her clothes and shoes. Phone charger, computer her socks and panties. Bra and purse.. checking for anything else she shoves what she can into her suitcase and closes it. Just then Val walks in grinning at her, "leaving so soon?" he questions winking at her and she nods giggling a bit.

"Home sick" she says and she watches his face drop a bit, "Oh.. well come back anytime" he says walking over to her and pulling her close. She drops the suitcase and wraps her arms around his shoulders. "and I mean tomorrow" he adds kissing her forcefully, she clings onto him as he lifts her by her waist and sits both of them down on his leather couch.

"I really need to go" Zendaya says as Val makes his way down to her neck and she can feel him nod. "Tomorrow" She says giving him one last kiss and walking out of the door. Val stares for a minuet and lets a sigh escape his lips.. he wished she would remember some things so it wouldn't feel like he was using her.

Walking into the kitchen he pulls out a beer, and he knows tonight was going to be a short night.

Song for this chapter- Change My Mind; One Direction ♥

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