how does anything progress without change.
and you can't change anything or make anything better if you don't show yourself. if you don't stand up and out. if you don't acknowledge a problem. nothing will change if no one tries.
in my own life, i am struggling with an essay i have to present on the topic of gay marriage ruling. i choose this topic myself and with the support of my friends. i'm scared. by doing this i'm putting myself out there. i'm showing what i believe where i never do. i never voice my opinions because i'm scared of the outcome. im scared of argument. im scared of the other side. im scared im wrong. i know that's very hypocritical considering how i started this but im trying to change for the better. im trying to get out there. im trying to fight more. im trying to be confident. im trying to help.
someone i know went to the women's march about a month ago. she used Hamilton on the caption of the post saying "rise up. History has its eyes on you." now i've heard these words about a million times listening to the soundtrack but this time they hit hard. they hit me deep down somewhere and i don't know what it means. it might be the fact that i really admire the person who wrote this and went to the march. she isn't scared to voice her opinions and knows what she needs to do. i wish i was her. and i know that if there were more people like her, the world would be a greater place.
i don't know what im doing with my life. i don't know what im doing even writing this. i don't know how i expect to change anything with what im writing because no one will see it. i just know that i have a feeling. i have a want to help. to change. and i hope that we can all find this. i hope that we can all realize that if we ever want to change something about our lives we can't just sit back and let ourselves be treated like this. we have to fight. it can be the little things like getting rid of a horrible friendship or big things like fighting against a horrible leader.
i myself have never fought much. when you have no one to fall back on you don't want to risk everything when one wrong opinion can lead to no one to talk to. when there's no one that you for sure know will stand behind you.
but i'm trying now. i've decided that it's time to change that. i finally have people that i can fall back on and i know will help me back up.
there's still people that will turn the opposite direction and leave me but that's fine. i don't need them. if i'm going to change myself and speak out and fight against things i know can't be right, then i don't need people like that in my life. people that turn their backs and ignore problems in this world that need to be changed.
history really does have its eyes on you. on the people living in this GRAND era. this is the time where people can change what is wrong. history is being made. this is the kind of change going to be written in the history books. and where will you be? will you be in the bleachers, just watching. or will you be on that field. fighting for change. you can be on the sidelines coaching and supporting your team. but remember. if everyone is on the bench, then who's out there playing?
this is a mess, i know. but its been a long day and i just had feelings that needed to be said.
