Man with the Bat || a Negan novel

Chapter 19: Love's Just a Four Letter Word

I didn't know what to do, what was there for me to do? Negan had discovered that Daryl had escaped. Daryl had had hours to flee the perimeter, by motorcycle it appeared from what I was hearing. He was probably long gone. If I had to guess he was probably at The Hilltop, that would be the smartest place to go. Negan and the Saviors didn't know that they were harboring Maggie and Sasha there, so if Jesus took Daryl and Nigel there then they might just be safe. I knew the first place they would search would be Alexandria, they would turn that place upside down.

"Damn girl" A voice calls from behind me, "You need a smoke? You seem agitated."

I hadn't realized it, but I had been pacing up and down, ever since Negan left.

The voice of the one who had hollered to me belonged to the wife of Negan's I met earlier, the one who told me to refer to her as B.

"Just a little stressed" I mutter as she steps forward, her heels clicking against the metal.

"Here" she sticks out her cigarette to me. I go to object, but then I realize, what bad is one puff going to do. So I take it.

I place the smoke between my lips, inhaling and then letting out a relaxing puff of my smoke.

"Ya wanna talk about it?" she asks me.

There was something about her, something that I knew I could trust. I leaned on the railing, her leaning next to me.

"What were you saying earlier," I begin, "About Negan, how you said he loves me?"

I passed her back her cigarette, her grabbing a hold of it with her long fingers.

"I knew I had to have got that stuck in your pretty little head all day" she cackles, shaking her head, her long dark curls bouncing as she did so.

I shrug, "I just was wondering what you meant by it," I softly mutter.

I felt like a teenage girl, asking her school friends what they thought the hot jock thought about her. Eagerly wanting to hear another's take on her views.

"Look" she puffed out another breath of smoke, "I've only been here a year now, but the way Negan treats you, well I damn well never saw that before," she leans on the railing, exaggeratively using her hands to refer to me, "that was till' you showed up."

I made a face at her in response, "but I don't get what you mean by that."

She sighs, as if I was just being ignorant and blind.

"Negan treats everybody like shit," she sums up quick and easy, "his own men he treats like shit. Making em' do this and that. Us wives of him, we don't want to be his wives. We wear skimpy little outfits and heels that make you want to cut you feet off because he makes us. He makes everybody do shit for him because that's how he believes he should be treated." Brandi takes in a deep inhale, "but you, now he don't do that with you. In fact, he just ironed a guys face because of you today. He beat the shit out of his right hand man because of you, don't tell me that ain't love."

I didn't think Negan loved me, I thought perhaps he was attracted to me more than others, but I didn't think Negan was capable of love.

"You just watch and see sweet cheeks, I'm sure you'll start seeing it soon enough."

There was no way, no possible way. He liked me, I was sure of this, but love was out of the question.

"Thanks for the talk B," I sigh out, "I needed it."

She nods in response, smiling a genuine smile, "no problem sweets, you ever need a chat, I'm your girl, in fact I think you'll find that all us gals are quite easy to talk to," she talks of the girls I had yet to meet, her eyes widening in realization, "matter of fact, come back and meet some of them."