Man with the Bat || a Negan novel

Chapter 39: Some Goodbyes Hurt Worse Than Others

"Carl!" I hollered at him, as we ran against the chaos. He didn't slow, he just continued sprinting. "Carl! I screamed once again. No response.

"Carl!" I halted, causing him to spin around and feverishly look into my eyes.

"I need to see him." I spoke, almost forcing the words out. Because here he was, treating our little Alexandria like it was his own demolition derby and I still wanted to see him.

"Mia, there's no time right now, come on!" He urged, grunting as he spoke, trying to yank me towards the sewers.

"Carl, I can't" I shouted back, "I can't."

And he knew that. His eyes sympathetically widened as he stared at me, the chaos around us seemingly blurred.

And I finally saw him.

Sweating, pale, weakened.

Something was wrong, something was very, very wrong.

"I'm bit, mia."

The words pierced me like an ice cold sword, spearing directly into my heart. And to only worsen the blow, he lifted up his shirt to reveal it.

A disgusting, bloody bite wound, dancing right along top his rib cage. Permanently edged into his skin. I knew what it meant. He knew what it meant. And we both knew there was no cure.

I was stunned, I let him pull me to the sewer now, somehow climbing down to safety with him shortly behind.

I heard him asking others if they were alright, if they were injured. And all I could focus on was how he was checking on others well being versus his own.

I slumped down onto Siddiqs cot in the corner of the room, staring blankly at the wall, my heart feeling as if it might burst in agony any second.

Carl noticed.

He silently slumped down beside me, grunting as he moved against his wound.

It was silent.

"How long?"

He sighed, "this morning."

I bit my lip to refrain from sobbing.

"Does it hurt?"

"A little."

Silence again.

"That's why...that's why you told Negan to kill you."

He shrugged, "nothing left to lose."

The realization hit fast, the tears flooding my vision uncontrollably, my body shaking with the sobs that began to flood out.

I felt his arms encircle me, pulling me into the side of his chest not mauled by a vicious creature of the underworld. Viciously sobbing into his shoulder as I tried to encapsulate this moment. As awful as it was, it was one of the last.

"Hey" he soothingly cooed, rubbing my back, "it's alright, don't worry about me." "Soon enough I'll be with my mom, Glenn, Sash, Abe, so on. It'll be alright."

"You're too young" I sobbed, "young and innocent and deserving of more. More than this shit show of a world."

"I'm not innocent," he shook his head, "that's for damn sure. And yeah I'm young but I've done a hell of a lot in my short lifetime. I mean, look at this last year alone." He pauses as I lift my head, attempting to wipe at my eyes. "You're going to be just fine without me. But I need you to do me a favor," he soothingly rubs my back, "take care of dad. And Judith, but mostly dad. I know you love Negan, but I need you to push him aside and focus all your love on dad for a little. He's gonna need it, you know it and I know it. He won't take this well."