Lifeless life

Unwanted words

"Yes, but why are you asking me that? Is it something bad"
I replied to him but I was somehow hesitate. The spirit stood there quite and he didn't want to talk but he finally opened his mouth and said
"When you turned to a monster you.............. killed your mother. You lost control and killed your own mother and I tried to turn her to a spirit after she was dead but I couldn't do it, after that your dad left you when you were 8 years alone and the necklace was given to somebody but I don't remember her well, the necklace then fell off her in the forest where you found me"
I stood there unable to talk or move, I was just dripping tears and then I fell on the ground because I couldn't stand anymore after that shock then I said
"How could I not remember something this important. I killed my own mother!?.With my own hands................. Why am I still alive??"
The spirit then patted me on my head and said
"It's not your fault, it is your father's fault. You couldn't remember all of this because your father erased your memories when you turned to a monster and you continued to forget about turning to a monster but since your body and mind got used to you turning to a monster, you could sometimes remember what you did when you were a monster. Anyhow you don't have to suffer alone now since I am with you. I was also compelled to kill people who were so dear to me. But I had to bear with it since I was born to save you and kill other people. I am the same situation as you, I become crazy sometimes and lose control and I do everything out of control"
I couldn't answer him and I continued screaming and crying. It was a sin I made by myself and I couldn't reverse it back or even try to get over it.