Vent

vent 7

sometimes i just get confused.

you know how you think you know what you're feeling, but then it isn't once you've gone out and had an entire day pass you?

there are days people ask me over and over again "are you sure you're okay" and i answer yes because its an automated response, but more than half the time i answer that because i dont know exactly how to describe what im feeling.

im feeling okay, but i have that sort of shadow i guess. my face tends to rest in a way that makes me look unbelievably upset for some reason, a teacher got concerned because i seemed quiet unhappy about something, which i guess i was but it was something i couldnt explain.

now i know what it was, and i cant believe it was letting you go that made me feel better, i feel lile shit that i did it, i feel fucking awful, because i know you wont get over me for a long time, you said so yourself, and you'll never read this i know but im sorry, ive said it through text, ive said it to your face, and you dont believe me.

so

i will keep saying it till you fucking believe me.
im sorry that i hurt you
im sorry i cant make you happy
im sorry that i 'broke your heart'
im sorry that you might have cried because of me
im sorry you are upset
im sorry you have to hide it
im sorry this is my fault.
im sorry.