Trapped

Chapter Nineteen: Invitations

He stares at the small paper in his hands, reading and re reading the black words. His eyes trace the outline of each letter, wanting them to disappear, wanting this whole thing to disappear. But he knows it won't. It's going to happen. Her wedding day.
He throws her wedding invitation onto the counter next to the now empty bottle of whiskey, not wanting to look at it anymore. He still can't believe he let his soul mate slip through his fingers. She is tying herself to another man in only a few weeks.
He begins to wonder if he should try to move on. She so clearly has. But he just can't seem to be able to imagine a life without her in it. Waiting is painful, forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of pain.
A knock on his trailer door interrupts his thoughts and he jumps up to answer it. Standing before him in a t shirt and boxer shorts is Vera. She walks inside without being invited and sits on his couch.
"Would you like to come in?" he asks sarcastically while closing the door.
"Am I making a mistake?" she asks, ignoring his comment.
Her question takes him off guard and he doesn't know how to respond. He simply sits next to her, taking his time to think.
"I'm sorry to ask you. We haven't talked for a while other than when we act but...I just thought I could come to you." she says, standing up again.
"I'll see myself out." she says. Nestor grabs her arm and pulls her back down next to him.
"I'm not sure how to answer, V. I don't know what you're feeling so I don't know if it's the right thing to do. Do you love him?" Nestor asks, wanting nothing more than this moment of friendship between them.
Vera thinks about it for a moment. She knows her answer. No. She doesn't love him. Not as much as she loves Nestor anyways. But is Nestor what is good for her right now?
"Your hesitation isn't saying positive things about Renn." Nestor's says with a soft smirk.
"It's complicated-"
"But it shouldn't be. You should be sure of your love for him. You should be excited and giddy for your wedding day. Not second guessing and on the verge of a break down. I think the way you're feeling right now should tell you if you're doing the right thing or not." Nestor says, staring into her blue eyes. He is right. She can feel it in her stomach. As if she were swimming and she wants to put her feet on the ground but the water was deeper than she thought. She sighs and nods, standing up. He stands up next to her and walks her to the door where they stop and face each other.
"Will you be there?" Vera asks.
"I don't know, V. I don't think so." he says sadly. Vera's eyes sadden even more and she looks as though she is about to cry.
"Nes, please. You're my best friend, I want you there." she begs him.
"I'm sorry, Vera. I just don't think I can do it. Not with...look I know you don't feel anything for me anymore. Maybe for you I was just a chapter in your life. But to me...V, you are the whole book." he says with a shrug. A single tear runs down her cheek and she quickly wipes it away. She cannot sort through her thoughts while she is in the same room as him. So she must leave.
"Alright. Well then I'll see you tomorrow for filming." she says, acting tough again.
"I'm sorry." he whispers again as she opens the door. Without a goodbye, she leaves, walking into the darkness of the parking lot.
Nestor closes the door, his mind racing while his emotions are all over the place. He knows he should go to the wedding. For Vera. But he doesn't know if he would be able to make it through without having a complete meltdown. How does one just sit and watch as their dearest love commits them self to another through vows.
And to make matters worse, the scene they film tomorrow is the one where Norma and Alex tie the knot. As if the universe has it out for him and enjoys torturing him.
Before he can process what he is doing, he is out the door, his bare feet connecting with the wet pavement as he runs after her.
"Vera, wait!" he shouts, making her stop and turn. He lets his eyes travel up and down her body, appreciating the look of the boxer shorts on her small legs.
"Nes, what are you doing?" she asks, only now noticing his tipsy state.
"I just..." he trails off, wanting nothing more than to tell her how much he loves her. How she is making the biggest mistake of her life by choosing Renn over him.
"I wanted to walk you home." he finishes lamely, chickening out. She smiles widely nonetheless.
"Alright. It's just right there though." she says, pointing to the trailer at the end of the lot.
"I know." he says, happy to be near her.
"You forgot to grab your shoes." she says, pointing at his feet.
"I couldn't let anything happen to you." he says with a shrug as they begin walking. He glances over at her, not able to keep his eyes away from her for very long. She glances up at him and he quickly looks away. They stop in front of her trailer and turn to each other.
"Thank you, again." she says, grabbing her door knob.
"Yeah, you're welcome. Anytime." he says, trying to think of something else to say to stop her from leaving. She opens the door and he begins to panic.
"Vera," he says quickly, making her turn around.
"Could I....do you want some eggs?" he asks. He mentally kicks himself for such a stupid question.
"Eggs?" she asks.
"Yeah. I could make us some eggs. And bacon." he says.
"I don't know, Nes. I don't think it's such a good idea." she says awkwardly.
"Yeah. Of course. Goodnight." he says, turning to walk away.
"Nestor," she says, making him turn.
"I...I am hungry. For some eggs." she says. He looks at her with confusion before she opens her door a little wider, inviting him inside. He smiles and quickly jogs up her steps and walks inside. She closes the door behind him and he walks into the kitchen to get to work.