'.......and that is why I believe sure as hell, Black,sure as hell,Don't Crack '.
"Finally," I sighed as I submitted the key to my degree, my very last essay
and now it's time to celebrate.
I hopped onto my extremely messy bed.
Time to watch YouTube videos.
As I was about to click an ASMR video my door opened ,"Hey Vienna,how's the essay going?" It was my sister Rosh.
"After three months, several cups of coffee and some shots, I am finally done," I said smiling,who wouldn't be grinning, I was finally going to be getting my degree.
"Wow, that's great," she said smiling but she looked at me with a puzzled expression,"so why are you in your pajamas, shouldn't you be celebrating?"
"I am celebrating, I haven't been able to enjoy a nice quiet evening just watching videos in months, so I've decided to indulge in some calming and relaxing ASMR videos, how about you?" I asked ," you're looking hot tonight,where are you off to?"
"I'm going out with Andre, we're going toa party, I was hoping you would come but I see you're in your zen mode so I'll leave you, see you tomorrow," and with that she left.
I shook my head, ever the Party Animal, "Bye, have fun!" I yelled.
I clicked the video, it was a binaural foam video, it was so relaxing, I felt myself drifting, tingles running up and down my spine.
"......I'm just going to.......gently.....squeeze .....your face...and now.......I'm going......to.....rub......peanut butter...on my face...and let my dog....lick it from my face..."
What the hell?!
I was looking at a dog licking peanut butter off a lizard's face.
"Did Rosh spike my cranberry water or was it the chips? On no, I've died and gone into limbo.
I didn't get to repent!
"Oh father I'm so sorry I pretended to like my uncle's ugly 'My Booty Is Fine ' sweater, I'm sorry I snatched Basic Britney's weave when she tried to take my man but between you and I, that bitch was crazy, I caught her sniffing bath salts in a cupboard, man, that shit was messed up but anyway, I'm sorry I..."
I was cut off by the lizard who was now sitting in my room, "Don't worry I would have snatched that bitch's weave too."
"Eeeekk! HOW DID...WHEN DID...WHERE DI...wait why are you dressed like a Middle Eastern rapper Jesus?"
The lizard was dressed in a white robe, a white turban, several gold chains and rings and had a....stick?
"It's called a staff, and I'm a rapper by day and a Shepard by night..... sometimes days, depending on my schedule but anyway, Moses is the name, cliche stopping is my game."
And he winked at me.
YOU ARE READING
Clichés Suck!
Umor" I thought vampires hated garlic." "Quite the contrary actually, vampires LOVE garlic, they have garlic cake, garlic liquor, garlic ice cream and even garlic peanut butter." "Well that's interesting," I nodded ,"so what about vampires burning in th...
