When I'm in the supermarket, I check my cart. I check it every time I put something in and then I'll get to the register and realize I didn't put anything in.
You know why I didn't put anything?
Because I don't eat anything and I'll stand there, by the fruit section, pondering that for a little while, trying to figure out how I'm alive. So I'll then exit the store, and grab a nice, little lunch at a nearby cafe. And feel so sick once I walk out of that restaruant.
What have I done? I'll think. But really, what have I done? I was reaching my goal and then I got worried and then I just ruined myself. But I guess, with anorexia, there really is no goal. Because the goal is never risky enough. Until it's too late. Until you're in the hospital being poked with IV's that lead to a rich in calorie food supply and you can do nothing about it. Pounds are constantly being added to you. I guess that's what scares me, really. The fact that if I take it too far... no. I know what you're thinking, I'm not afraid of dying. I'm afraid of losing progress.
Because if I do die, I want to die skinny. oh so skinny.
But today wasn't like those other days because I saw Clint from across the isle, his arms snd his kisses draped soothingly over a beautiful girl. I felt a welling, aching hate on my chest for her immediately. It was almost like I couldn't control it and then I got envious of the tasty items she was packing into her cart as he only smiled and encouraged her. He didn't care if she got fat. But she probably wouldn't gain anything anyway. Girls like that don't gain pounds.
Before I knew it, my fists were clenching and my eyes were burning so I simply and quietly walked out of the store. And don't even think for a second that I went into the cafe. Oh no, I'm too strong for that.
YOU ARE READING
Darling & Foster
Teen Fiction"I would kill to be skinny," She would always cross her arms and say. So she did what she said, she went killing, but the only person she was killing, was herself. //COMPLETED//
