I'm sorry, I'm stupid, selfish, sensitive and unreasonable.
I don't know what the hell I'm doing.
I'm not good at making decisions, and I rarely do so. I'm always afraid whenever I make my own decisions, I'm always afraid to even converse with others because I always think that they might not like me or they think of me as a funny being. I'm afraid that maybe I might hurt someone with the decisions I've made, but even with this thought I still do. I'm so stupid.
I'm not used to have an other half and all the things that comes with it. I'm not used to receiving gifts from someone, getting random hugs with someone, chat someone 24/7 or be that one special person to someone. Yes I may fantasize about how it's like to be that special someone yet now that I'm somewhat am, I don't know what to do. I'm still a child after all and I'm new to these things.
Whenever you say that whenever I have problems with you, I'll tell them to you for it not to get worse. But whenever I think about it, I always think that my problems aren't worth it, that it is too childish, that I maybe over reacting. I know you also have problems so I never really bothered to tell you mine. I'm a depressed individual so I'm somewhat use to it. I just want you to be happy, that's all.
But I really couldn't help it, you know. I'm a sensitive person, my emotions are always on the top. It was never my intention to let you think I was mad at you or anything, well maybe a little. I got carried away and boom there you have it, I'm at the top of your problems. Whenever I feel this tingling jelly feeling in my system, I start hating myself for feeling this way.
You know, I'm somewhat envious of you. You get along well with everybody and become somewhat popular because of that. With your hilarious laugh and wild attitude, people just want to hang out with you. Unlike me, a socially awkward girl who do weird stuffs, is silent and likes to be alone most of the time. Forgetful, sensitive, stupid, weird and whatever bad traits I have, it's expected for people to stay away from me. But you, you were friendly and lovable I presume. I feel bad whenever you say sorry, you're still a free man you're not obliged to stick to me.
To sum everything up, I'm not worth it. All these negativity plus with my anxiety and depression acting up, it may take awhile for it to disappear but I hope you'll have the patience to wait for it to go away.
Thank you and sorry for being unreasonable.
