Act like you love me

Smiling through the pain : chapter 5

         --------------------------------------------       

After eating at the diner my parents dropped off Shawn at his house then drived home. The drive was silent and peaceful which made me want to close my eyes but I had to stay awake.

Before Shawn got out of the car he told me we needed to meet up. I told him to pick me up around 12:00 AM and it was 11:30 PM at the moment.

When the car fully stopped I grabbed my suitcase and my small bag and sprinted up to my bedroom. I throw my stuff on my bed then rushed into my bathroom locking the door behind me.

I undressed quickly and got into the shower. The ice cold water covered me making goosebumps form on my skin. In less than a minute the ice cold water warmed up to a practical temp ature. I put both shampoo and conditioner in my hair hen rinsed it out as fast as I could.

     --------------------------------------------------

I finished my shower in record time and dried my hair even faster. I looked in my steamy mirror over the sink and stared at my reflection which I barely recognized. I look away and start to get dressed.

I wanted to look cute for Shawn since this is sort of like our reunion but knowing me I didn't bring a lot of cute clothes along with me. After what felt like forever I found a decently cute outfit. I put on my American Eagle light wash ripped jeans with my favorite white t - shirt that I wear everywhere I liked it because it looked cute with my lacey velvet bralette that I wore under it. Then for shoes I decided black high top converse worked fine.

I brushed all the knots that have formed in my hair out until it was as good as it could get. I looked in the mirror one last time, sprayed a bunch of perfume, took a deep breathe then walked out of my room leaving my phone behind.

I crept past my parents in the kitchen then opened the front door slowly and as cautious as I could. Once there was a big enough Crack I slide out the door, closed it then practically sprinted to the curb of the sidewalk where I would wait for Shawn.

10 minutes past by and I look to my right and finally see Shawns black jeep coming around the corner. I stand up and brush my self off.

Walking to his car I felt like I was gonna have an anxiety attack but I smiled through the pain.

Slamming his door shut I give him a small smile trying to not make it obvious that I'm in pain. My stomach turned as he put his hand on my thigh. He moved his hand higher up my thigh and I just smiled like an idiot. The feeling of Shawn gave me a sudden sense of relaxation. I stopped my muscles from being so tense and tried to relax through this car ride.

He took his hand off my thigh and the pain returned. It was starting at my head then down to my stomach. I felt as if someone was throwing punches at me in both my head and my stomach.

Then the flashbacks spread throughout my body reminding me what had happened to me. Reminding me why I had to leave Shawn. It wasn't Shawns fault, he didn't need to know, I never wanted to tell him, so I left.

I quickly grabbed Shawns hand and put it back on my thigh. The relieve set in just like before I didn't have to smile through the pain.Not anymore.

  I'm gonna tell Shawn, why I left all of it....

Tonight is the night I'll tell Shawn the truth...

AHHH DID I SHOCK ANY OF YOU? PROBABLY NOT BECAUSE I DIDN'T TELL YOU WHY SHE LEFT YET BUT I DID GIVE YOU SOME HINTS. anyways this chapter wasn't planned so it's not edited sorry but thank you for reading byyeee!!!

          -leah💜