Perfect II: The Art Of Living

Chapter 20

Chapter 20:

“Thank you,” Sebastian whispered under the wire gauzes that wrapped his face in such way only his right eye could be seen. The chiseled jaw and the arrogant nose now cloyed under those white strips of linen. Some stained with blood, some had been thin enough to show off purple epicenters of pain. Equivocal his whole condition was, Sebastian’s smile existed behind the wrappers.

              Ethan sat beside his hand and rubbed his palm where the IV kissed him, providing him unconditional love, filling him up that he’d never feel hunger. Satisfied. Abundant. Ethan played with the daisies he bought for him. He plucked a stem from the vase and tickled it to Sebastian face.

              “Stop it,” he hardly voiced with a sleek giggle.

              Ethan chuckled and halted. “What am I gonna do to you,” he cooed. Ethan sighed and when he turned to Sebastian after throwing the flower away, his old friend’s smile now only existed in his thoughts. As if, implying… Kill me…

              Ethan returned to his position and scooted nearer. “Why?” he inquired and brushed the bandages that covered his scalp. He talked to the air. His subject got lost in oblivion.

              Ethan always tried to collect himself when others could not do it to them. However, he found it hard for him as well. He woke up seeing Sebastian on an overused white mattress, looking at nothingness as tears created a path on the bandage.

              Enid inhaled, trying to draw her tears for her eyes only. Ethan glanced at her as Sebastian was busy staring at the ceiling. He quickly wiped his tear as well and took a very deep breath. Before he could cheer up with a fraudulent smile, Enid had ran away, mary janes tapping her way.

              Ethan could not hide his tears. He sobbed. He desperately sobbed, failing to reserve patience or even strength. His hand dampened Sebastian’s as he cringed and tear up his face from creating a loud staccato of cries. Sebastian turned to him and bleakly looked at him. Ethan did not stop. Tears had blinded him. Tears barricaded his vision.

              A real friend lives with your soul. Not in your heart. Not beside you. A real friend knows how to independently react in courses that happen in your life; freely giving ideas you need. You deserve.

              Sebastian projected his hand reaching out for Ethan’s face. Ethan ducked and leaned forward to snuggle the bandaged arm. Only, he lamented even more as the wire gauze scratched his skin. His emotions gave in and he fell on Sebastian’s chest.

              “You should not have left us!” he blamed. “If you have not, you are not suffering this right now.”

              Sebastian grinned. Somewhat, he did suffer. He could not wipe his friends’ tears, and not even his own.

              Fear will never stop. Each second, fear is evident. Each second, we defy a fear and eventually in a sweep of an arm, we have another fear at hand. It all goes in a repetitive cycle where defying and acquiring fear are in the same paramount twist. One can defy fear but all to have another set afterwards.

              Sebastian feared that he’d die alone. For once, he’d be happy again in Lacey’s arms. He could have known how to smile again. For once he could have seen those red curls roll on his forehead again with the dandelion lamp illuminating them the whole night. As ironic everything was, the red curls burned him. The smile he wished to have was now the smile he projected now. He defied his fears. He had another one facing Lacey the third time around.