Broken Into New.

Chapter One

I sneak out of the window of my room. Before I jump I take a look around the room. I memorize the smell, the temperature, and where everything is. It's funny how you never know when the last time you'll be somewhere is. We're so focused on the bigger picture that we forget the little details. That's something Alex taught me, he would always notice the smallest things that I turned a blind eye to. 

I jump out my bedroom window and brace myself for the long drop. I hit the ground all at once in a painful furry, but not as painful as I thought. I find the bag that I hid the night before and I head out my driveway. I check how I look in the small mirror I have in my bag. I oddly don't miss my dirty blonde hair or the length of it. Newly being a redhead makes me feel even more impavid than I had felt before. If you knew me before this you could have said I was fearless maybe even crazy. Some used to say I used the line between fearless and crazy as a jump rope. I suppose I did because I didn't much care what happened. 

The evening summer air fills me with old memories that I push to the back of my mind - they're useless anyway. My shoes scuff the ground of the driveway which seems to drag on forever. The past six years I've biked and walked up and down this same path, one dreadful time after another. It's only a two and a half mile walk to the pond and I'm already a mile into the walk. I pass memory after memory but I keep in mind that I must leave old memories to make the space for the memories that I have strived for. I've dreamed about this day for two years now. It's quite interesting how you can meet a person and become addicted so easily. They say drugs are destructive but have you ever tried love?

 I begin to skip along the narrow trail that I once rode horse down in my younger years. I see the musty pond that is my destination for the night. I start to run out of excitement. The happiness carries me purely to the point I almost fall into the pond- which doesn't sound that bad because of how hot it is. I proceed to look around until I catch a glance of Alex.

 He's calmly sitting on a oddly shaped rock; just sitting there admiring the view. I'm not surprised, this is typical Alex. I walk over and sit on the rock beside him but I turn so that I'm facing him. It takes him a second to turn to face me. I hadn't seen him since my mom had banned me from seeing him. This would happen to be the same day that I gave up on any relationship with my "mother". 

I don't say anything, I lean in and our lips collide just like they used to. I missed how in this moment nothing else was a worry to me - It was like no other. We both pull away and we both begin to talk but before he gets a full word out, I cut him off and quickly say "I missed you so damn much." He gestures as he moves over to come sit with him, which I oblige out of pure need to be close to him. 

I admire how the moonlight makes his eyes even more beautiful than they are in the daylight. I think moonlight makes everything better, almost like natural photo shop for the human eye. He wraps his arm around me and it feels like time slows as we catch up and talk about old times. Mostly discussing how ridiculous I look with red hair, although it's not a fire red but a natural red. I can't recognize myself with all the changes to my appearance I made before I left. 

I gather myself to get up and he questions me, I just reply with "well are we going swimming or not." He replies with "I didn't bring a swim suit." I roll my eyes and say " I didn't either but have you ever heard of skinny dipping?" I begin unbuttoning my rather tight blouse and then slide off my jeans and eventually get to my bra and underwear. By that time were both naked but that not something we're embarrassed about. 

I run over to the edge of the water and jump in. The cool water feels so good with how hot of a summer it's been and I mean that figuratively and regularly. Just as I was starting to relax, a splash of water hit my face. I wipe my eyes and scream "Oh you're dead now." This declares a splash war and he knows it. I look around and realize he must be underwater. Suddenly I feel something in the water around me, and then I get another splash to the back of the neck. I turn around and get splashed again. 

I playfully surrender because this is a war that I can't win. He jokingly asks "since I won, what do I get?" In a more serious and maybe even taunting tone I say "anything you want." That's when he leans in, our faces less than an inch apart and I close my eyes. All of a sudden he splashes my face and my only reaction is to splash him back. At this point we're both laughing and splashing each other. As I'm about to turn around to continue the splashing his arms wrap around me and I settle quickly. I swiftly spin around that we're facing each other. I jokingly say "are you going to kiss me or not?" 

That's when our lips meet and I'm totally consumed in the moment. I swear every time I kiss him gets better and more addicting. Almost like an alcoholic drinking their favorite shot, but it's not really realistic to compare this feeling to alcohol because there is no comparison. I want to stay in this moment; I want to live in this moment as if it was a house that I could move into. I come back to reality and continue to kiss back with even more desire than before. I pull away and take a moment before I stumble upon saying "I love you." He looks into my eyes and he says "I know I've told you this before but, I love you more." I smile and politely say "We should probably find the towels in my bag", But as I begin to walk away he gently grabs my arm. "are you sure you want to run away tonight, you know it's a big commitment right?" I stumble over the question but quickly answer with "I know what I want and that happens to be you. So yes, if running away is what it takes to be with you then I want to do it." 

I walk away to go find the towels because it's starting to get a little cold. I wrap my towel around me and hand Alex his towel. He's always been quite skinny, even skinnier than I am. When I met him I found him attractive in a nerdy way. Somehow that changed as I got to know him. Who I had thought was just cute was really hot. He runs his fingers through his hazel colored hair which uniquely matches his eyes. 

I quickly turn my glance to something else so that he doesn't catch me staring. You may think that last thought was out of shyness and you'd be right. I have more shy moments than I even care to mention. That's another thing that he changed about me. He made me want to invade other people's personal space but mostly just his personal space. I remember when we first met we used to hang out and I made it so awkward. It took time but he ended up being the person I felt most comfortable around. 

I slide off of the rock I was sitting on and sit on the ground while leaning against that rock. I close my eyes and drift off into a short nap. Probably the best sleep I've gotten in years because I feel safe here. I don't have to worry about someone coming in my room screaming or my mistakes chasing me. I can just lean on this rock and know that tomorrow I will be his. "His" the word rolls around my dreams and I know that I must be smiling even though I'm sound asleep. I know that the dreams I pondered for years are finally coming true and that's all I've ever wanted.