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Divine

The Heart, Monday's night;

It was a silent night. Not like the usual temperament of the Heart. No sight of couples sitting together in each other embracements, strolling around hands in hands, sultry bantering between lovers, and shadows of two people hooking up from behind the secluded dark umbra. For the first time, the place seemed holy. Or perhaps, it was Monday, as people hadn't still kicked out the Monday's blue for a night out.

A tall and slender figure roved down the roses island lost in his train of thoughts. The dim street lights higlighted part of his features in the background of pitched darkness. His neck were crooked down bringing his eyes gazing the pavements. At times, the aimless legs would lob random pebbles on the ground. Both of his hands were slid into the black long pants' pockets with his shoulders dropped forwards. The defeated demeanor was clearly potrayed, even from a distance.

Eventually, he took a seat on a wooden bench facing the calm lake. He gripped the metal hand-rest before bringing his hands together into a clasp. He stare into the still water. He could see the reflection of the full silver moon on the surface, wavering a little bit, when a gush of wind hurled by. There were water, wind, metal and earth - all of the five basic elements, except for fire. The absent of fire gave a gloomy and tranquility to the ambiance. Even, inside him, the flame had long been put out. Except for the last few days, a few flickers of embers had sparked inside him before withering again.

At the wat, a bleak Sunday;

"Sawaddee khrap, thaan." He placed his clasped hands so that both of his thumbs were in between his eye brows while bowing his head.

"Sawaddee, luuk." The monk in orange wrapped attire whirled around to have a look on the one who greeted him.

"Thaan, khrap. May I ask a little bit of your precious time for a consultation?" He was still in his wai position. His face was scrunched hard as he was holding back his tears.

"Of course, luuk. Let us come inside and pay our prayer first. By the way, what is your name, luuk?" The wrinkles on the serene face of the monk appeared more obvious as he curved a comforting smile towards the young man while patting his shoulder.

"Tee, khrap."

Tee felt a little awkward while praying before the huge golden statue of Buddha sat cross-legged with seven-head dragons overlying His head. He rarely went to a wat, let alone pray to Buddha. Usually, on Sunday like this, he would attend the mass at nearby Catholic church, hearing sermons, and singing hallelujah. After all, his mother, who was an avid Catholic, never failed to bring him to the church since he was small.

He just mimicking the movements of the monk, understood nothing from the prayer chanted in Old Prakrit (maybe, he wasn't sure himself). He was then presented before the monk with both his legs folded to the side and the monk sat cross-legged on a flat yellow cushion. The old monk looked at the young man's troubled countenance with a semilunar eyes. Meanwhile, Tee glued his gaze to the floor where he was seated.

"What's on your mind, luuk?" The monk finally broke the mute between them.

"Thaan..." Tee gulped his saliva hard before continuing his words, falteringly.

"... Is it wrong ...to be ...a gay?" Tee finally completed his sentence, though a bit stammered.

The monk calmly putting on a smile on his face, understanding the reason behind the distraught look of this young man.

"Luuk, is it wrong to be a man?" The old monk question causing Tee's face to change into a perplexed expression.

"I guess no, thaan." He only answered shortly, still baffled to where this conversation was going.