Vacation of Nightmares

~Chapter 5: I've Lost Him

~Chapter 5: I’ve Lost Him

            “You sure you don’t even want to meet Oli?” I asked Jalen.

            She shook her head from in front of the TV. “Maybe I’ll go on a walk by myself sometime today.”

            “Should I stay with you?”

            “No, no! Go! It’s okay.” Jalen smiled at me reassuringly.

            “Okay… But if you need anything, call me!” I told her. I left the apartment to go meet up with Oli.

~~~~

            “Hey, haven’t seen you in a while,” Oli said as I walked up to him. He was waiting outside the hotel.

            I laughed. “Yupp! That’s why I wanted to meet up! Haven’t seen my bud in a long time, eh?”

            “Well, it’s because--.”

            “Oh, Oli. You don’t need to bring that up. We’re just friends, right? Kellin shouldn’t be able to stop me from making friends. Why is everyone so worked up about this? It was just a Twitter fight. Do you dislike Kellin like he dislikes you?”

            “To be honest, yeah. But that shouldn’t stop me from liking you, right?”

            “Yeah, like a friend.” I looked at Oli, who nodded without saying anything. We walked along the streets of England and hung out for a few hours. It was a great day. Until my phone rang. “Give me a moment, Oli,” I said, excusing myself from the restaurant table we were at.

            It was Kellin calling. I picked up. “Babe?” I said into the receiver.

            “Oh, now you’re calling me ‘babe’? What are you doing, hanging out with Oli?! I thought we went over this! I DON’T LIKE HIM! I don’t want you anywhere NEAR him!” Kellin yelled into the phone.

            I immediately fumed with anger. “You’re not the one who makes my friends, Kellin! He’s my friend; he’s done nothing wrong to me! It was a stupid fucking Twitter fight, so GET OVER IT!”

“I don’t care if it was just a Twitter fight! I DON’T GO NEAR THE BITCHES YOU HATE, WHY DON’T YOU DO THE SAME FOR ME?!”

            “So now you’re saying we can’t be friends? Is that it?! I THINK I’M ALLOWED TO MAKE FRIENDS WITHOUT YOUR PERMISSION, KELLIN QUINN BOSTWICK!” I yelled back. People were staring, but I didn’t care.

            “First of all, I’M NOT SAYING THAT, and second of all, if this is your attitude, then fine! BE THAT WAY! I thought you fucking cared, but I guess you don’t!”

            “Stop being such an asshole, Kellin!” I was nearly crying. “We’re just FRIENDS!” I yelled into my phone. “Why do you have to be such a child?!” I was half hurt and half angry.

            “No, I’m not being a child! I’m just wondering why I don’t hang out with any of the people you hate and yet, you can just go and hang out with who I hate!”

            “I never told you who to not hang out with, Kellin! YOU ARE MISTAKEN, BECAUSE I LET YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT! I’m not so controlling, LIKE YOU! Do you even care?!”

            “Of course I care! I care a whole fucking lot about you! I’M JUST ASKING THIS ONE THING!”

            “HE’S HELPED ME BEFORE YOU DID, KELLIN! HE’S ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS!”

            “HELPED YOU?! WITH WHAT?!”

            “MY DEPRESSION! He helped me BEFORE you came into my life! BEFORE I met you! I GREW APART FROM HIM WHEN WE STARTED GOING OUT.”

            “So it’s MY fault you guys grew apart?!”

            “No, just LISTEN! You also helped me too! YOU HELPED ME STOP! And that’s why I love you! I love you so much, but this needs to stop, Kellin. I can’t just do everything to please you!”

            “Please me? You think this is pleasing me?! You don’t get it, Annaliese. You just don’t get it.”

            “You know what?! YOU don’t get it! I gave up one of my closest friends and I NEVER complained! I JUST HANG OUT WITH HIM THIS ONE TIME, AND YOU GET FUCKING PISSED! What the hell is wrong with you?! IT’S JUST THIS ONCE!”

            “I DON’T FUCKING CARE ANYMORE, JUST GO! BE WITH OLI THEN! I don’t fucking CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU DO ANYWAY! WE’RE OVER THIS!”

            “YOU JUST SAID YOU CARED--!” He hung up on me.

            I couldn’t believe it. Kellin was so clingy to the point where I couldn’t even hang out with my own friends.

~~~~

           I rode up the elevator in utter depression and unlocked the hotel door. “OH MY GOD!” Jalen was lying on the floor, unconscious, with bottles of pills all around her. I dropped all my shit and ran up to her, shaking her. “Jalen! Jalen! Wake up! This isn’t funny!” I cried, tears rushing down my face. “Get up!” I listened for a breath. She was barely breathing. I pressed my hands on her chest, trying to get some air into her lungs. “Jalen, Jalen! WAKE UP!” I yelled. I even slapped her face a few times. “DROP IT, YOU FREAK!” I sobbed.

            She finally snapped awake. “Annaliese…?”

            “OH MY GOD!” I yelled, throwing my arms around her. “Don’t EVER do that AGAIN! Did I not tell you to call me if you needed me?! Jalen, how could you?! You almost DIED!” I sobbed. “Don’t scare me like that, damn you!” The tears wouldn’t stop as Jalen hugged me back.

            “I’m so sorry, I lost control of myself,” she apologized.

           I shook my head. I was crying too hard to answer. “I n-never should’ve left you,” I said. “I’m such a terrible f-friend, I’m so s-sorry,” I choked out. “I’m not l-leaving you alone, ever.”

            Jalen cried too and hugged me back. “I’m so sorry, I was so depressed and Andy--.”

            “Shhh, shhh,” I said, taking control of myself. “It’s okay. You’re okay. You’re okay.”

            “I just thought Andy had changed,” Jalen cried softly. “I just felt so terrible. I miss him… I’m sorry, Annaliese.”

            “No, no, Jalen. It’s okay,” I responded.

            “Did you have a good time with Oli?” Jalen asked.

            Tears came rushing back into my eyes as I remembered Kellin’s break-up with me. “Kellin dumped me.”

            “What?! WHY?!” Jalen asked, sitting up.

            “He said it was because I was hanging out with Oli…”

            Jalen was silent. I knew she was thinking that she had already warned me. “I…”

            “No, it’s okay,” I replied. “Everyone warned me. It’s my fault.” I burst into tears. “But Oli was my hero before I started going out with Kellin!” I sobbed. “I was actually in love with Oli, but then I met Kellin and I… I… I lost feelings for him and turned to Kellin! Then I started dating Kellin and because he hated Oli, Oli and I grew apart and I just wanted to see him again, but then Kellin gets mad and I--!” I stopped to breathe, crying. “I don’t know what to do!” I sobbed. “Now, I’ve lost Kellin. I’ve lost him.”