𝐀𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐑𝐀 | 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬

✧ chapter 42 ✧

1977

The summer holidays couldn't have come faster for the crazy eight. As they all boarded the Hogwarts Express things felt almost normal again. They had all been corresponding with Mary every day and were pleased with the progress she was making. Her mother had made her weekly appointments with a muggle grief councillor and it was really helping. After what happened all the trivial, juvenile pettiness seemed meaningless. Aurora and Remus's breakup was put into perspective for the two of them as they realised how lucky they had been to part amicably, or to even have had each other in the first place. James and Lily were better than they had ever been. James decided that his declaration of being done with Lily Evans seemed null and void and had been slowly easing into an almost friendship with her. Lily hated to admit it, but she almost enjoyed James's company now, looking forward to their daily conversations during mealtimes. Marlene had used the traumatic events as an excuse to get even closer with Sirius, using him as an emotional crutch to lean on and the two were also better than ever. He still hadn't found the right words to say to end things with her and after what happened to Mary he thought he would never find the right time. Something was always coming up. On the bright side, James and Lily weren't fighting and Aurora and Remus were no longer miserable. Things for the crazy eight were almost looking up. Almost.

✧✧✧

The first couple of weeks of the summer holidays the crazy eight spent as much time together as possible. As they were all seventeen and had gone to the ministry to get their apparition licences as soon as they could it was far easier to meet up. Mary was the only one left who was yet to come of age, so the group took it in turns picking her up.

During one of their meetups, Sirius finally found the right words to let Marlene go. He told her he did love her, but not in the way she wanted him to. She didn't take too kindly to hearing this however and dissaparated almost immediately after slapping him across the face. Although it was hard and Marlene was upset it did feel as if a weight had been lifted off of Sirius's shoulders. That night he sat down to write a letter to Aurora confessing how he felt officially. He was sure by now she had figured it out, but he wanted it to come from him firsthand. He wanted it in writing:

Dear Rory,

I've been trying to find the right words for a while now. I ended things for good with Marley today. She slapped me across the face. I know I hurt her but it's for the best. I'm not sure how to casually slip this into a letter so I might as well just come out and say it; I think I love you.

He scribbled out the last line and tried again.

I know I love you.

Once again he stopped, marking his second attempt at expressing his feelings in writing with a definitive strike through the neatly formed letters.

I love you.

Simple and to the point. Satisfied at last, he continued;

I have for a while now but the timing was never right. I tried to deny it but I couldn't any longer. So there. I've finally said (well, actually written it, but in a way, that's far more official). I'm not really sure how to finish this letter.

I hope I can see you soon?

Love, Sirius

It took almost a week for Aurora to reply, during which Sirius almost drove James insane. When her reply finally did arrive, both James and Sirius read it with bated breath.

Dear Sirius,

I'm not sure how to say this. Remus and I have been talking and we decided to give us a go again. I feel awful. I should have told you sooner. Everything with Mary just put stuff into perspective you see. I hope this doesn't change anything. I still want you in my life.

I really am sorry,

Rory

Sirius felt his stomach drop. He hoped the ground would open and swallow him hole. How could he face Aurora again after he confessed his love for her and she replied saying she was back with her ex. Her ex who also happened to be his best friend. The thought of seeing her was far too mortifying to even consider. James tried to comfort him but Sirius stormed off, dissaparating with a loud crack. All that he left behind was Aurora's letter in a crumpled up ball on the floor.

Sirius didn't even realise what he was doing or know fully where he was going until he found himself in Marlene's bedroom, looking at a very startled Marlene.

"Sirius! What the hell are you doing here?" Marlene hissed, still a little shocked.

"I'm not too sure actually. I just apparated without even thinking and brought myself here." Sirius replied truthfully.

"Want to talk about it?" Marlene asked, narrowing her eyes suspiciously. It was obvious Sirius was upset. He sat down on the side of her bed and stared off into space for a few moments, before just coming out with it and telling her the whole story.

"So, let me guess, Aurora rejected you and you've come crawling back to me then?" Marlene snapped sarcastically once Sirius finished explaining. Sirius flinched once he realised that was exactly what he had done.

"Well, let me tell you something for free, Sirius Black. I am done waiting around for you. I will not allow you to walk all over me anymore. I don't deserve it." Marlene was on her feet now, waving her hands about as she ranted animatedly.

"You're right," Sirius cut her off, much to her surprise.

"I beg your pardon?"

"You're completely right, Marls. For years, I have taken you for granted and I'm sorry. I've never been who or what you wanted me to be. I've never been what you needed. I'm sorry." At this, Marlene pulled Sirius into a tight embrace.

"Thank you," she whispered, taking him by surprise.

"For what?"

"For finally letting me go." This statement resonated with Sirius as he realised all those years that he strung Marlene along he'd been subconsciously scared of cutting her loose because then he would be completely alone.

Sirius left not long after, the two of them parting ways as just good friends. He felt a slight warmth inside that he had finally done something right by Marlene, but then it hit him that for the first time in his life he was truly alone. Aurora was taken and Marlene was no longer his to do with as he pleased. The warmth was extinguished as a sudden emptiness took over. He felt cold and hollow.