Always Be Appreciative of Opposable Thumbs

How It All Started

Hey there! So some of you who have been following me for a while already know that Opposable Thumbs began its life as a short story for a contest. There were certain elements that needed to be included (cabbages or radishes, the words "gardyloo" and "bumfuzzled," and someone being gifted a magical hat). I was thrilled that readers were interested in seeing more of Willow and Hugo, and that's how this longer story came to be. So here is the original short story in all its poorly edited and silly glory. Enjoy!

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 Hugo was the loveliest boy Willow had ever seen. He had it all: a melodic voice, unwebbed feet, and a featherless body. She could watch him sell cabbages for hours on end.

"Cabbages! Fresh, green, and delicious! Get them while they're fresh!" he bellowed.

Willow sighed dreamily. However, with a basketful of radishes to sell, she really had no time to ogle her fellow farmer. She tore her eyes away, tightened the ties of her golden bonnet, and made her way further into the market.

"Gardyloo!"

All in the market stopped and looked skyward. The faint yet familiar warning that came from the clouds was never ignored. Still, even with the alerts, one could never predict where the waste would land.

Willow's eyes widened as soon as she caught sight of the brown liquid. From the looks of it, the load was about to fall right on—

She moved to warn him, but the cabbage farmer had already seen it.

"No, no, no, not again!" he cried.

In vain he tried to move his cart. At the last minute, he jumped away, right as the smelly liquid hit his cart. The splatter still managed to reach him.

Slowly rising up, he shook out his sleeves. Some in the crowd tried to hide their titters. Willow was rooted to the ground. She wanted to help him but was afraid to approach the boy she had been admiring from afar for so many years.

Without warning, another object fell from the sky, this one solid and very, very large. It was a metal bucket, and, just like the brown liquid, it hit the cabbage cart. Unlike the excrement, though, the bucket did far more damage. The cart exploded into splinters, and the cabbages were thrown into the street

"Sorry! Hand slipped!" came the faint voice from above.

Now the laughter was not concealed. All were guffawing at the cabbage farmer's plight. Hugo, who was now covered with even more disgusting liquid due to the explosion of his cart, threw his hands into the air and plopped onto the ground. With his back to the laughing crowd, he heaved a despondent sigh.

She could not stand by idly. Picking up a cabbage head that had rolled towards her, Willow took a deep breath and approached the sad boy.

"I believe this is yours," she said, holding the vegetable out to him.

Hugo glanced up at her and grunted. "How do they always manage to hit my cart?" he said, not taking the cabbage from her.

Willow shrugged. "I believe others have had damage done as well," she said. "You just seem to experience it a tad more often."

"They think they're being polite by giving us fair warning, but what would really be helpful is if they'd find another way to dispose of their muck."

Living beneath the Giants wasn't all that bad. They were a peaceful and generous people, and they mostly kept to themselves, aside from when their merchants came to town to do trade. Their wares were well-crafted and in great demand. Yes, they were wonderful neighbors, except when it came to emptying their chamber pots. They were considerate enough to shout out a warning, but that didn't help with the aftereffects.