harry
*
i woke up feeling terrible. my butt hurts and i can barely walk. i decided to take a bath, perhaps that'd help. thinking of what ashton and i did, i remembered about louis. perhaps i should visit him today. i smiled, i know things ended badly but i just really want to see him before i leave. speaking of leaving, i have yet to talk to ashton about it. he'll understand, he did it to me before. or, i can always just leave and not tell anyone about it. i needed some alone time. i don't particularly have a destination that i'd like to go to perhaps i'll just travel around the world. i've always wanted to do that but louis was always busy and i didn't want to do it alone at that point of time. i'm tired of waiting, i'll just do it myself.
after bathing, i went to the kitchen to make myself some coffee. ashton's already in his office, he left a note. that's surprising, who knew he knew how to do that? he didn't before. ashton is a really nice guy, a gentleman even. i'm just not ready for another relationship. my past relationships hurt a lot. what ashton and i had wasn't actually a relationship but i'll consider it a relationship. i'm tired of people leaving, this time i'm leaving them. if we can talk things through then maybe i'd keep in touch. i hope we can talk things through.
i took an uber back to louis and i's appartment. i'll miss this a place a lot, i'll miss louis, ashton and my family members. but i really need a break. it's not fair, i'm the one constantly hurting. i'm always the one crying and waiting. i've had enough. i'm standing up for myself. i'm going to do it, meet louis and talk to ashton.
thank god my butt doesn't hurt that much anymore.
after driving for 2 hours, again, i reached the hospital. i was optimistic about life. i walked to the elevator and pressed 4. once it reached the level, i walked out and immediately started looking for room 32. after walking for almost 5 minutes, i reached the room. i took a deep breath and turned the doorknob. as soon as i opened the door, my heart broke, again. zayn and louis was making out on the bed. i turned and walked out, slowly closing the door shut. tears rolled down my cheeks involuntarily. he really didn't want me. i should've known. perhaps ashton doesn't want me too. i bit my lip, hold back my tears and proceed to the elevator.
i walked out the hospital and it started raining. i burst into tears. what did i ever do to deserve this? i decided to leave, for good. fuck ashton, he broke my heart too. everyone did.
i drove back and packed my bags, ready to leave. i booked a ticket that'll be leaving in an hour. i didn't even leave a note or even a text. god, i really need this so bad. perhaps i'll meet someone new. maybe i'll be happy. just maybe. i don't want much, just love and happiness and staying here won't do. i crave for something new. and adventure maybe. just something. a change of atmosphere, living conditions, weather, boys, fashion.
i ordered and uber and went to the airport. when i reached the airport, i saw ashton. i looked at him, curious. then i saw his whole family walking towards him. he ran and pulled them into a hug. i smiled, his family is here. he'll be okay. i really wish i could stay but i'm not the one for you ashton. you deserve so much more. i can't even satisy louis. and you, you left before. i wish you the best.
the trip to sydney will take about 21 hours. i can have some sleep during the journey. i'm excited. i can't wait to find out what sydney can offer me. new life, new me. i'll meet new people, make new friends, have a new place to stay in. everything will be alright. i was left with 30 minutes in the airport. i decided to grab a quick lunch. i'm starving, i can't even remember when was the last time i ate. i bought subway and was able to finish it all in 5 minutes.
after waiting for about 20 minutes, i was finally able to board my plane. after making myself comfortable, i looked out the window and smiled again. i will miss you a lot redditch. it's been a good 21 years. see you soon. i plugged in my earpiece and closed my eyes.
**
author's note!!
hi loves. i know, this chapter is hella short ): i'm exhausted but i really want to update. i hope you like it. i'm sorry if it sucks a lot. i'm tired which means my brain can't process shit so yeah. and i'm also too lazy to check for any errors so point it out nicely. leave a vote and a comment.
bye for now. love, a
