Gasoline Hearts {Phan} #WattPride

Chapter Twenty Six

.....don't kill me.

"Mr. Howell?" A nurse asked, and instantly Amethyst and Phil shot up, Alex with the baby two steps behind them. "Is he okay?"
"Is Theodosia okay?"
"What's going on?"
"Can we see him?" They all asked, and the woman took a deep breath, removing her hat to show dark purple hair. "I'm sorry for your loss Mr. Lester." She said sadly, and his eyes widened. "L-loss?"
"The baby....she didn't make it. Her lungs weren't developed enough to breathe fully and even with the help of the tubes...she wouldn't have made it. We tried, and she stopped trying, stopped breathing, and then her heart stopped. I'm sorry." She whispered, and the mad turned away, going straight to Amethyst who held him against her as they cried, both in a state of shock.
"Dan?" Alex asked, and the nurse smiled. "Dan is doing well. We got the blood to stop and he's stabilised.  If you want, you can go see him. Room 5." She said, and gave Phil's arm a pat of sympathy before walking off.

After a few minutes Amethyst and Phil parted and walked to Dan's room hand in hand for support. She let go when they got to the door and took a deep breath. "Ready?" She asked, and he shook his head. "Not really."
"Get ready Teach." She said, and opened the door walking in to see Dan pale and weak looking in bed, an IV in his elbow along with a lot of scary machines on either side of him. "Hi." He whispered, and she waved sadly. "What? You look like you've watched your best friend die." He said jokingly, and then saw Phil in the doorway, holding back tears.
"Where's Theodosia?"
"She, she didn't make it Dan. I am so sorry." Amethyst whispered, and he blinked, tilting his head quizzically. "But, she was just here. They had tubes in her to help her breathe and then they all left quickly and took her with them." He said, mind reeling to find any other explanation than the one he was given.
"Dan, I know this is hard to grasp, and I understand how you fe-"
"You had your daughter Amethyst!" He snapped, and instantly regretted it with the flash of anger and sadness that went through her grey eyes.
"That's not who I meant Dan. You know it."
"I'm sorry Ame. It's just. My baby girl." He said, choking out a sob it hit him, finally.

His baby was gone, like one Amethyst almost had a year prior to Danielle. At 8 months she miscarried with a baby boy, and she did it at home, with no one there to hide the baby from her. Dan found them, and called police. Then Danielle came, and now it was supposed to be Theodosia, but she didn't make it either,

"I. I'm so sorry Dan." Phil's voice said, and Dan looked over to see Phil standing by the bed, his eyes horrified and full of guilt. "You didn't do this." The brunette whispered, and Amethyst kissed Dan's head before leaving, shutting the door behind her.
"I should've been there more, I shouldn't have gotten you pregnant. I should've waited for you to graduate." Phil rambled, and Dan shook his head, holding out a hand to Phil.
"Come here." He said softly, and the older obliged, taking Dan's hand as he sat down, eyes watering. "We lost our baby, please don't let me lose us too. I need you Phil. She was ours, she was yours and mine. You held her. Felt her body. Saw her face, her eyes, her hair. It must be killing you. I carried her. Read to her sang to her, I dreamed about what she would grow up to be. About her and Danielle. I felt her grow and kick and move. I could feel her everyday. Now she's gone. It hurts us both, and no things will never be the same. But we can't let her make us become distant. Your all I have of her now, and I would hope vice versa. Just please. Don't let me lose you too." Dan whispered, his voice breaking on a sob as Phil leaned up and embraced him, their tears mingling on the hospital sheets, turning the white a dark grey. "I...I can't go anywhere Dan. I can't leave you. Your all I have. Of her. Of anything. We'll get through this eventually. Somehow. Someway. Just. Please don't lose yourself on the way to doing that." He whispered into Dan's hair, and the brunette cried harder, burrowing himself in Phil's chest as the older man held him, no words spoken.

That's how the two were found later when Gerard came to check on Dan, and his eyes welled up. Once done, he left the two and went to the desk, wiping his eyes. "Gee?" His husband Frank asked, and the red haired man turned. "Out of all the miscarriages, stillbirths and dead children I've seen, none have done this. Those two....they can make it through this. Theodosia Lester just made them closer. They have something rare Frankie. Something you find once in a lifetime. They're in love, true and unadulterated. I've never seen that." He explained, and then left to see another patient.

"Is love going to be enough?" Frank asked as he watched his husband walk away, and then turned back to the room he just left. "God I hope."

Please don't kill me