When in Sochi

HOT MESS ♡

It took everything I had not to call JR, or text him, or even.... Wait a minute. I don't even have his number!!!!! Hahahahaha EL OH EL!!!! No, but really.... It took EVERYTHING I had not to drive over to him or to even think about him. It was the worst feeling in the world.

As I sat in my room alone, I watched the sun set past the billowing peach clouds that would reach Alaska by dawn. Tbh, lowkey, I was missing Alaska... And all my teenage scumbag friends... I haven't used tbh or lowkey in a while. I wonder how it was back home...

I changed into my silk Victoria's Secret nightdress and sat on my soft and squishy white bed and started to read the People magazine I picked up on my front door to my room.

There was a lewd picture of me on my knees and Apolo looking down at me convincingly.

The title was: THERE SHE BLOWS, THERE SHE BLOWS AGAIN

"This is honestly ridiculous," I said angrily as I threw the magazine on my lap. Well at least People followed my request on not bothering JR... Hold on, I see something...

'Apolo Ohno's love interest seems to have eyes for another, fellow short track teammate JR Celski. Sources tell us that she and JR got intimate the other night. Name of the love interest won't be released due to publicity liabilities until further notice, but she is supposedly 16 years old, says a source who knows her. If this were true, both JR and Apolo would be arrested in the city of Sochi since she is underage.'

I threw my head into my pillows and screamed. I haven't done that since... Since I was 16. Who would do this to me?!!!!! Really, who?!!!!!!

I walked over to open the door. And, to my utter HAPPY surprise it was...

"Hey," JR smiled sadly.

"Hi," I replied rather awkwardly. His timing could never have been perfect. I beckoned him to come in and he took a seat on my bed.

"I read the article," he said, gulping, looking up at me earnestly.

"None of it is true, it's all bullshit," I muttered frustratedly. Then I looked upon his beautiful face.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a girlfriend?" I asked him quietly.

He looked at me and ruefully put his head down. Shaking his head, he smirked.

"I don't know. When I first met you, I was infatuated with you, but since you're my publicist, I didn't think we'd be getting anywhere anyway. And, plus, you were with Apolo. At least I thought you were..."

I sat down with him, and his arms were around me.

"But then that time when you defended me in front of the press and everything and... that incident in your hotel room.. I realized that I'm in love with you. And it wouldn't do Andrea justice or you any justice either if I had the both of you in my heart at once. So I chose you."

He kissed the top of my head and brushed the hair out of my face. In high school, my hair would always be down. I would push it behind me, but it would come slithering back like a black snake.

"You were thinking about her, weren't you... when we were having sex.. you were thinking about Andrea... I feel so, SO bad.."

JR swiftly reached for my face so quickly that I nearly jumped.

"No, no, no, no, no," he shushed me gently, "when I was alone with you, what else could I have thought of if it weren't for here and now?"

I shook my head. "I'm not a good person, dude."

Then I started to cry into his shirt. "You're a great person, a beautiful soul..." he said gently, caressing my arm.

I shook my head and sniffed. "I apparently did it with an older guy, a guy who was married by the way, to get this publicist job. I'm apparently a ruthless stone-cold bitch at work, I-"

"-what do you mean, apparently?" he asked, his eyebrows raised in concern.

I sobbed and looked at him. "I don't remember anything from when I was 16 to when I got to Sochi a few days ago as a 26 year old. I skipped a whole 10 years of my life and I... I don't know how to undo it, I just... I'm a... I'm a...."

"Hot mess?" JR suggested with a smile curving up his lips. I turned to look at him, insulted.

"Hot mess?" I repeated. "You think I'm a hot mess?"

"Every time you look at me with your damsel in distress face. Every time you smile. You're like a sad teen with a happy face. And when you were snoring sound asleep in my arms the other day, I fell in love with you."

I just lay in his chest for a while, the sound of his exhaling and inhaling in tune with my birdlike heart beat. I wanted to stay like this forever. After a long period of silence, I murmured,

"So what do we do now?"

He sighed. "I don't know." Then he looked at me. "What did you mean when you said you were only 16?"

I chuckled. "Omg. It's a funny story, really..."

"Oh?"

"Yeah.... I'm, I'm actually just 16 in disguise."

Suddenly my eyes widened. An idea occurred to me. Outside my balcony, there were Northern Lights dancing up in the sky. What if THIS could undo everything and bring me back to normal? Which means I'll be 16 again... Which means JR probably won't want me at 16. No one will.

I clambered out of bed and ran out of his arms into the balcony.

Please, I said quietly while I looked desperately up at the stars and the array of colors dancing above me. Let me be 16! Please!!

After a good waste of 10 minutes that I could've just used for beautiful sex with this beautiful boy who stood behind me in concern like I was about to commit suicide by flinging myself off the balcony, I heaved in disappointment and slumped on the bed.

"Uh.... What just happened?" he asked me.

He held me in an embrace and I kissed his cheek.

"I'm just being a hot mess again. A 16 year old hot mess."