After ✔

16

Wednesday afternoon, Gabriella decided we should have lunch together, all of us since it was the one day she was excused from work. Her boss just had a baby.

So at twelve, she called Dani and I, asking us to meet at her downtown in an hour.

Now, I watch Gabrielle feed Mason with a plastic spoon, a smile on her face when she sees he isn't making a mess.

The waiter had just gushed over what an adorable child he was, which resulted in his smug smile.

"Where's my brother?" Dani asks.

"He's busy." She replies. "Had a couple of files to go over or something." Her eyes turn towards the window, and I can see why. The view is amazing this morning - with light snow falling over bare tree branches.

Surprisingly, I see a few birds too. Which is rare in winter.

It's a beautiful morning.
So why do I feel so hollow inside?

Is it because I've finally made my decision, or because I'm about to tell them?

I glance at Dani, whose sitting besides me, texting Raze on his phone. He's dressed in a warm sweatshirt and dark jeans, yet he still manages to make that look good.

I'm just about to open my mouth to tell them, but Mason makes a noise instead.

"Mommy, can I have ice-cream?" he asks.

"No, honey, it's already cold as it is."

Mason pouts and turns to me. His eyes land on my uneaten piece of chocolate cake.

He doesn't even need to ask, and it's not like I'm hungry.

I pick him up and place him on my lap after I smooth the wrinkles on my skirt for the tenth time. It was cold even with the restaurant's heating on -  and thank God I had worn my thickest pair of tights.

He takes my fork and cuts himself a larger piece of cake than he can swallow.

My eyes shift to Dani. When he notices, he smiles softly. There were no negative feeling after that night - he had even offered to make me a cup of coffee - but I still felt horrible.

I had sprung up something I shouldn't have. It's another thing he didn't react as badly, but that didn't make me feel any better.

One of the reasons I decided what I should have a long time ago.

Because it was time I stopped kidding myself. Sure, he was alive and healthy, but he didn't have his memories. 

I guess the alive and healthy part is more than I would have asked for, and I should be grateful.

"Guys," A hint of a sad smile is splayed on Gabriella's face. "I'm going back."

"Huh?" I frown. "California? For Christmas?"

That was just three days away.

"No." She shakes her head, pushing her plate of half-eaten gnocchi away.

"My parents moved to Ithaca this summer. I guess that's where I'll meet them."

"Ithaca?" I ask. "Ithaca, New York?"

"Why are you so surprised?" Asks Dani, turning to me

"I'm not... but you do realise Ithaca is close to Montrose right?"

"Sorry." He chuckles. "They didn't teach us that in school. Is Montrose where your family lives?"

"Yeah." I answer. "Gabriella, why are you going?"