So I'm in a bad mood, here's a sad shot. Try to enjoy <3
Song - (Original) Welcome to my life - Simple Plan
Genre: Sad Fluff
Warning: Sad, depression, suicide - TRIGGER WARNINGS - NOT FOR FAINT HEARTED
Words: 2122
-TaylortheDinosaur ^,-,^
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Cry/Ryan's POV
I sat once again on the carpeted floor, against the black leather sofas. My face soaked with salty tears and my arms rested on my openly spread legs. The dull red liquid dripped off my fingertips, drop by drop into the light grey fuzz. Staining the floor to a dark crimson. I'm not the only one who feels like this...
Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Breaking down is a routine...Waking up with a soggy pillow, wet cheeks and sore bloodshot eyes from crying yourself to sleep every night...
Do you ever feel out of place?
Always bullied or abused and tortured with these nasty situations. Everyday you are treated like a freak, a monster. No one is there for you. You are always alone...
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you
I got up from the floor, a small pool of blood blackening the original colour. I stumbled to the bathroom, the white tiles already covered red. Thinking of all the times when I wanted to disappear from life on Earth.
Do you ever want to run away?
All the problems swirling round in the tiny space of your mind. Contaminating every happy memory, and every happy thought. Ruins of a fantasy. Just to escape the haunting thoughts. The taunting voices. To run away from the villain, known as depression.
Do you lock yourself in your room?
The only safe space we know. In our own boundaries. Our own living space/ Our own room. Just to cry into the tattered, drowned pillow like always. To stare at the faded paint walls and listen to the arguing, the yelling, the banging and the silence. The horrific silence...
With the radio on turned up so loud
Some say music is the great escape. But what if it's only a shield to block people from knowing the true meaning behind every lyric and the emotion behind every chord? You can relate to those lyrics, can't you?
That no one hears you screaming
I looked into the mirror, to see a monster. The reflection showing my drooping eyes, a murky blue. The crooked nose upon my pale skin and my wonky lips. Grotesque features. The negative comments sticking in my mind like bees attracted to pollen. The statements like, 'No one loves you, and they never will', 'Why are you so ugly, you pathetic freak?', 'Get away from me faggot'. Always there, always repeating. Causing them to stay locked at the front of my mind, never leaving.
No you don't know what its like
The pain. They caused pain to me, mentally, physically. And for what? For fun...for satisfaction...
When nothing feels alright
Now I cause pain, and destruction. Not for fun or satisfaction. But to be in control. Permanently scarring myself by my own hand and a metal surface. The blood, spewing from my veins create the control. To know that I'm still alive...I'm still surviving.
YOU ARE READING
Youtuber One Shots
FanfictionA large book full of small stories. All about big-hearted people on small screens.
