Crossing The i's And Dotting The t's

(X) Last First Day

"So let me get this straight," said Radhika's high pitched voice over the phone, "Kian asked you to be his girlfriend and you told him to give you time to think over it and now you've called me. Talk about Deja vu."

'Deja vu'  yes, that described this situation accurately, or as accurately as possible.

I had done the exact same thing little over a year ago, but at that time, we were discussing Karan. I had kept him hanging for a couple of days during which Rads had convinced me to say 'yes' to him, in order to keep the group intact.

"So what are you gonna do?" She probed.

"I have no idea. What would you do?"

"If I was in your place?" She laughed, "you know Ash, the minute he first stepped into our class, I almost wished I didn't have a boyfriend."

I chocked on my saliva.

Coughing slightly, I wheezed out, "what?"

"Lol! No I was joking. You know I love Vivaan."

No I didn't.

"You love him?"

"Yeah, sort of. I don't know how to label it really. I love being with him, spending time with him and  I cannot imagine maintaining just a simple friendship with him. But I don't think of him twenty four×seven."

"Oh kay....well, I must say, that your non-platonic love is really convenient." I laughed.

In her usual fashion, she let out a loud laugh, so loud that I had to pull my phone away. It was almost a minute later before she was moderately quiet again.

"I know right?" she got out, still chuckling lightly. "I don't get why romantic heroines whine so much. If you use your brain the right way, then love won't bring you agony, infact, it would be, like you say, convenient. "

"But you haven't experienced that sort of love right? The whole so-called true, deep, all consuming passionate love. The love which makes it impossible to live without the person that love is subjected to."

She laughed again. "Subjected to? God Ash! How technical are you? And no I haven't. I don't think I would ever want to experience it to be honest. Why tangle yourself in a love so devoted that you forget yourself? Especially when you can happily be in love with a person while being aware of yourself and loving yourself more," she mused.

"True," I agreed. "I often feel that love is subjective to your experience with that emotion. I mean, everyone needs basic family love. But after that, if you don't experience explosive love, chances are that you'd still be happy as you'll love a person to your best potential, without losing yourself in the process. Maybe that's why arranged marriages work so well."

My subconscious was, for the first time, admiring me. Even I had no idea that I could be so.....philosophical.

"Yeah, okay, I get it. Though I am now starting to lose track of this conversation."

"Right, me too," I said. "But talking about marriages, are you gonna marry him? Vivaan, I mean?"

"What? No!" she almost shouted. "I'm just seventeen Ash, marriage is almost fifteen years away! I just love him enough to not break up with him anytime soon. Convenient remember?"

"Oh cool!"

"But why are we talking about me and Vivaan? I believe the current crises is about you and your oh-so-hot neighbour."

I groaned loudly, considering my god awful voice, it was a pitiful sound. "I don't know what to do Radhika. I really have no idea. There is no good answer to his question."