Reform

autumn (four)

"So, where do you live?" I asked as I pulled out of Marcus' driveway, as if I wanted to bring her home, I would have to know where home was for her.

"I live on Crestview Avenue, by that park? Do you know there?" she asked, smiling over at me, looking down at her phone and scrolling aimlessly through the notifications.

"Yeah, of course. Colton actually lives right across at Catalina, so that works out really well. It's a nice neighborhood, from what I gather from being at his house all the time. You like it?" I asked, glancing over at her as we turned.

"I do, yeah. It's just me and my dad. My mom got my brothers and the house back in Arizona after a messy custody battle, and my dad got me and the dog. I was born around here, so my dad decided to bring us back. He liked it, and I do too, so far. Tonight helped with that," she smiled, leaning over and kissing my cheek as Colton mumbled incoherently in the backseat.

"Just ignore him," I advised, turning my gaze to the back seat for a second. "He has the worst alcohol tolerance i've ever seen. He probably won't remember anything past his first drink, if anything. What kinda dog do you have?"

"Golden retriever. I named him Rufus. My parents got him for me 7 years ago when my twin brothers were born so I didn't feel left out. He's been more of family to me than anyone else in during the divorce, really. My dad tries, but he's got a lot more going on," she confessed, offering a half smile in reassurance. "Do you have a dog?"

"I do. She was actually my mom's therapy dog during her cancer treatment, but since my mom died Lacey's been more of mine. My dad really just sees everything as a reminder of her, so I have to make sure she stays with me on the third floor," I explained. We both had sad-ass backstories without dogs. Why can't they be all cute and fluffy, like the dogs themselves?

"I'm sorry for your loss," she offered, rubbing my back.

"It's all good. It's been around 13 months, and we've gotten into a better routine. But still, you're the first person i've told since who hasn't gone all pity party on me. I appreciate it. You can be sorry for me, but it'll help all that more if you just treat me like a normal person. Or, in your case, like a fuckboy you're attempting to reform," I replied, leaning over and placing a chaste kiss on her lips as we waited at the light.

"You're already doing a pretty good job!" Colton exclaimed from the back seat, sitting up violently. Wouldn't be surprised if along with a hungover tomorrow, he has whiplash. "Just before we came here, he was praying he would never change his ways!"

"I guess I decided that someone was worth trying to change them for," I deadpanned, glancing over at Violet, blushing nearly the color of her name.

"Fucking cute," De Muller mumbled from the back, already back to laying down, his eyes half closed.

"Very fucking cute," Violet reinstated, smiling brightly and proudly up at me.

"Instagram couples goals?" I joked, mocking the cocky smolder that most male 'models' on Instagram seemed to do, all the while Violet did that whole open-mouth stare that all their female counterparts did.
"Of course," Violet laughed, looking up right as I turned onto Crestview.

I smiled back at her. We smile a lot, the two of us exchanging them back and forth. It's cheesy, like we can't think of anything better to do. And the we've barely known each other for a night. I don't know why she's different; I don't know what's special about her.

She's not like Carter. She doesn't play into her sexuality and use it to her advantage, but she's also not the girls I toy around with, either. She's someone different; someone new, refreshing. She doesn't care about popularity or being the perfect couple or being perfect people. But I already know that I could love this girl. I don't love her now; I hardly know her. Yet she's the first person since my mom that I think I could truly, genuinely love.

"What number do you live at?" I asked, waiting unnecessarily long at the stop sign since it was midnight and no one would care, and, of course, because any extra time I get to spend with Violet, i'll take.

"1523. It's sort of right smack in the middle of Crest and Bayside," she explained, biting her lip in some sort of anticipation. "It's a pretty convenient place to live."

I smiled over at her, turning off of Bayside onto Crestview, slowly cruising down the street.

The house I pulled up to at 1523 Crestview Avenue was mainly blue, with bricks around the doorway and some trees scattered around the front yard. The place seems to fit Violet well; a little lonely, a little different, but a whole lot special.

When I looked back over at her, she had some hair behind her right ear, her dress' skirt bunching up to expose her thighs, and she was looking at me with those damn blue eyes.

"Thanks for the ride. And for making my first official Cali party enjoyable." She smiled at me, looking perfect as hell, and I knew that I couldn't let her just walk away. Not yet.

"Here, let me walk you to your door,"

I don't do this kind of thing. I don't open doors, i'm not chivalrous, and I sure as hell don't walk girls to their damn door.

I don't know why Violet's different, hut she is. And I can't lose her yet. Not before I ever even know her. So, before she could reply, I hopped out of the driver's seat and walked around to open her door for her.

"Thanks, Parker," she remarked, wrapping her hands around my arm and laying her head on my side as we walked, almost tantalizingly slowly, to her door.

When we got to her door, without saying anything, I pressed my lips to hers, bringing my hands down to the curves of her body as hers wrapped around my neck, pulling me in closer. This was better than our first kiss; better than any other kiss i've ever had. I'm a fuckboy, or at least, I was. This night may have actually changed everything. So far, only one night of my life has really defined me: August 21st, 2015. The day my mom's cancer finally got to her.

But today, nearly 14 months later on September 30th, 2016, may be another night that changes me. And honestly? I'm happy. Kissing this girl makes me happy and makes me want to be able to continue to kiss her for ad long as I can have the chance to.

So i'm actually going to try.

Try to reform.

Try to change my philosophy on life and get something better out of it.

Try to no longer be a fuckboy.

So when we pulled apart and she walked back into her house with a wink and a smile, I could only think one thing: i'm gone.

-

and now, four months later, another part to reform!!! but good news- i've figured out how i wanna do this in order to be able to write whilst on nantucket this summer for the first time in like 8 years (!!!). so there will be a prologue and 3 chapters for each season (autumn, winter, spring & summer) and they will all only revolve around 1 night and the development of vi and parker's relationship that has happened in each time stretch, all leading up to the summer- dun dun dun.