Faded (Sequel To Suicidal) [Completed]

Did You?!

I woke up on the bathroom ground. Blood stain was all over. I grabbed a towel and rubbed some water in it. I cleaned up the blood mess and stains. The blood disappeared in one swipe, like what I wanted to do. I then cleaned my arm and made sure that I was all clean.

I got ready for school and left the apartment. It's funny that the school has put up with me for a year, yet they don't understand what I go through. They think it's that my parents left me.. But it's more than that. It's everything.

Once I got to school, I made my way to my classroom. Once I walked into the room, my desk was filled with lillies, aster, purple and white hyacinth and anemone. There was a banner that read 'Please forgive me. I still love you.'

I rolled my eyes, and pushed the flowers onto the ground. A few students saw it, and they started whispering to each other.

"If... You did... Would you leave me that.. Long?" I looked up from the flowers.

Seokmin was standing shocked by the door. There were tears forming in his eyes. Seungcheol came in the room and saw the tension in the room.

"Seok-"

"I'm fine," Seokmin smiled and walked to his desk. 

I left to find the broom and dusk pan. I didn't want to explain anything to the teacher when she say the mess. I found the broom behind the door. I cleaned up the mess and threw everything away. I didn't want him to do anything like that ever again.

I sat down, and took out my things. Once I did, I felt Hoshi and Seungcheol's presence.

"Jisoo, please talk to him?" Hoshi pleaded.

"No," I said.

"Jisoo, please, he has reasons-" Seungcheol begged.

"And maybe I have reasons not to talk to him," I growled and kept getting ready for class.

"Jiso-"

"SEUNGCHEOL AND HOSHI! I DARE YOU TO INTEGRATE THAT POOR BOY!" I heard Woozi yell. He walked up to us, "Esspicailly you, Hoshi! Didn't WE SAY THAT SEOKMIN WAS DOING IT BY HIMSELF?!?"

Woozi was now yelling at Hoshi and pushing him out the room.

"Jisoo, just, listen to him. Please?" Seungcheol whispered before turning around.

"Seokmin should stick up for himself, not being a weakling and having you  to help him," I put my pencil down, "If anything, I would listen to him, if he could do it himself."

"I won't fight on that with you," Seungcheol mumbled and left me.

I wasn't scare for him to talk to me. I was scared of him telling my why he did what he did. I was scared of him leaving me again. I was really scared.

I sat there thinking, I didn't notice the teacher coming in and telling our lesson.

"-Jisoo! Hong Jisoo! Are you listening?"

"Uh, sorry, ma'am," I bowed a little.

"Okay, but anyways, you all will get into groups of two. Each one will take out the importance in Hamlet. Both read the English and Korean version. Then get combine with another group to do a huge collab together. After that, you will present it to the class. This project is due next two weeks. Any questions? No? Okay, class dismissed." She said and started packing up.

I got up and walked up to her.

"Miss, may I work alone?" I asked.

"No. This is a group project, but if you like, then I guess. It will be hard to come up with all the main importance things," She explained.

"Okay," I nodded and went back to my desk. 

I got out a notebook and started writing the main details in the book and supporting details. I was already done with finding all the details, when Seokmin came up to me.

"H-hey, Joshua, I was wondering, if you would like to work with me?" He asked.

"I'll think about it," I nodded.

"Please? You are the only one left, and I don't understand this book!" He whined.

" I said-"

"Jisoo says YES. Now shut up and work!" Jeonghan said.

I saw him blush, but I rolled my eyes. This kid, still the same as ever. 

"Jisoo~" He sung.

"Shut up or you'll leave," I mumbled.

"Talk to me, please?"

"Does it has to do with this?"

"No."

"Then no."

"Shua~"

"I will kill you if-"

"Joshua Jisoo Hong?" 

"Seokmin, you have a death wish," I rolled my eyes.

"I am sorry," He smiled.

I ignored him and kept working. Once our break was over, I ignored the boy next to me. I didn't think he would talk to me the second day he was here. I noticed that the day went by pretty fast. Either I was listening to Seokmin, or else the teacher. I don't know.. I don't really know anymore.

It was lunch when Seokmin came up to me.

"Jisoo? Aren't you going to eat?" I shook my head.

He pulled a desk over. He sat down and looked at me.

"I want you to listen to me. I want to say that I am sorry. I really am. Right after you went unconscious, I lost myself. I didn't know what to do. I felt that it was my fault that you cut that deep. That you fainted. I felt like it was better if you didn't have me in your life, since all that happened. I wanted you to be happy. Once I left, I still felt guilt. I felt that, even if I leave, you would be hurt. But I kept thinking of the p-positve," He took a deep breathe, " When Jeonghan came to us, he told me that, you weren't yourself. That you seemed, slimmer, and darker. I thought that it was okay. Something probably happened to you, other than me. Then, Minghao, really Minghao, called me. He yelled at me, gave me a lecture about how you won't look at him. You ignored him. Everything happened. He told me how the cuts became deeper. When he saw the cuts, when he described everything, he cried. He said that he lost a good friend."

Seokmin cried. There were so much tears coming out.

"A-and then.. I then, felt the pain. I, then, felt like I needed to come back. We couldn't come back until two days ago. We didn't have to money to come back, Jeonghan first came back, to ask everyone to gather money to get us back here. Seungcheol's parents helped us. They brought us back. I wanted to see the day we got back, but school already ended and I couldn't find you. And yesterday, when I came to your house.. You weren't there," Seokmin cried, " I am really sorry."

I finally felt my own tears. It finally came down, all over my face. I didn't want to cry. He really left because of me. He really did. We sat there in silence until the tears were dry.

"Did you even think twice when you left? Did you? Did you know how much everything hurt once you left me? Did you or no?" I whispered loud enough for him to hear.

"I s-s-sorry," He shook his head.

"I knew it," I looked outside the window.